Page 59 of Tendu: Dancing in the Castle

His class was awful. He stood vacantly between exercises and didn’t correct anyone. With no pianist present, he kept choosing completely unsuitable music from his phone and blasting it through the studio speaker system at full volume.

“For heaven’s sake, Aleks,” said Michelle during her research class, where he seemed unable to pay attention. “Are you sure you’re well enough to be down here?”

Lunchtime in the great hall was cold, the novelty of Will’s clothes having worn off. I made the mistake of meeting Aleks’s stare and then it was hard to break away, but Will’s chatter had become disturbing.

“I think Simone must’ve given him the boot. He’s not quite right. Have you noticed? Didn’t think it would bother him that much. Hope he’s all right for this afternoon. I’m getting a weekly private lesson with him. You should come too, Malph. We could get him to show us high lifts. You won’t have a partner in pas de deux anyway with me gone.”

“No, I don’t want to,” I said, getting up and heading underground with the others.

Simone was also missing her partner, and Mr. Timms suggested we ‘gals’ partnered each other. But how would it work? Who would play which part? We eyed each other uncertainly, and then Will barged into the dungeon.

“It’s sorted,” he said to me. “Told him you were feeling down and would be better upstairs with us. He said it was a good idea.”

Will was so annoying. Aleks was so annoying. I could have done without this. For once, the dank dungeon had been a welcome retreat from difficult things. However, I left Simone to partner Mr. Timms himself, and headed up in the lift.

Aleks was more together for Will’s lesson, though still far from all right. After demonstrating a better hold in a lift, he carried on talking about holding on tight and continued to literally do so. To my waist. “So she knows she is always to be safe with you.”

“Malph knows that,” said Will, holding out his hand for me.

“Yes. She know you for a long time. But one mistake can ruin everything.” He still didn’t loosen his hold. “Is a betrayal of trust. I understand this.”

We stared at each other through the mirror.

“Are we doing this, then?” said Will, impatient, and we finally moved on.

“Is good. You do well,” Aleks told us on the way back down the stairs after the class. “Is scary be so high in vulnerable place, so open to hurt.”

I shook my head. “I knew neither of you would drop me.”

“Ah, but you are unusually brave.”

“Better get over there,” said Will, as we entered the hall. “Bevan’s ordering you stuff on your phone.”

I sat down by Justin, glad for Will’s interruption, Aleks seeming to have lost any ability for discretion.

“I know what it is you remind me of, in this get up, Phi,” said Justin. “A kid from a special-needs documentary.”

“Stop being bigoted,” I told him.

“You’re right. They have stylists and would never look this bad. You, however, have me.”

“Aye, and me,” said Holly, approaching. She deposited a large mug of something red on the table in front of me. “If ye can drink chocolate, ye can drink that too. Tomato soup. Best thing for upset,” she said.

I looked across at the staff table, to see if Aleks was eating. He should eat.

“My room, now,” said Justin. “You can bring your sad soup. Hearst may try to enable bad choices. We’ll be better off alone.”

So I sipped soup, sat under Justin’s blankets and let him tell me what to buy. Then I trudged the long stone trail to bed.

“I didn’t want to hurt you.” The voice from above made me jump. Aleks was sitting on the stairs, outside his room, waiting.

“You have to believe me, Malphia. It was not in my mind that you were hurting.” He looked manic. I suspected that no dinner had been eaten. “You have to believe me,” he repeated, standing up. “Is not to justify, but you say I see and keep doing. Is not this.” He ran his fingers through his hair, causing tufts to stick out, increasing the general air of mania.

“I believe you.” I circled around him and stood a couple of steps higher.

He took a step closer. “Stay with me tonight.”

His hands cupped my face. I shut my eyes, desperate to remain calm and controlled.

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