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His nose nuzzled my ear. “I like it rough, but I didn’t want to hurt you … not this time.”

My pussy clenched around his thick cock with his words. He already knew what I liked after watching the video. The bastard had a head start on me. Somehow, I would have to even the playing field.

Cole held onto the base of his dick, then pulled out of me and removed the condom. He hopped off the counter, then strolled across the kitchen to the trashcan in the cabinet beneath the sink. I rolled over on my side, my gaze taking a slow, sensual hike up and down his toned and muscled back, ass, and legs.

He turned, a smile on his face. “Are you staring at me like a piece of meat?” A low chuckle filled the air. “I feel so used.” He covered his cock and fluttered his eyelashes.

I sat up, gawking at him. “Did Cole Parker just make a joke and laugh?”

He flashed me a sheepish grin. “I do that sometimes.”

“Huh. I had no idea.” I softly giggled, basking in the realization that Cole and I had finally crossed the line and had sex.

Cole’s eyes swept over the curves of my body, appreciative and adoring. Butterflies fluttered in my belly. No one had ever looked at me like he did.

I scooted my butt to the edge of the counter, then he picked me up and lowered me to the floor. He ran his fingers through my long hair, then fisted it, tilting my head back. “You’re not leaving. You’re staying right here with me. If you try to go. I will deal with you.” He gave me a quick peck on the lips, then released me, but not before he playfully swatted my ass.

“Guess if I try, you’ll have to catch me first.” I flashed him a mischievous smile before I gathered my clothes off the kitchen floor.

“I’ll do a lot more than try, baby.”

This playful, sexy side of Cole was what I needed. At least I understood why he’d waited to touch me, and a part of me appreciated him for caring. The other part of me was hurt and confused. I’d needed to be with him. Whether Cole realized it or not, he’d reached inside me and touched my heart, giving it strength to continue beating. When you’re lost in the darkness, even a single ray of light can give you hope. Cole was my light.

I piled my pajamas on the kitchen counter and wrapped one arm around his neck while my other traced his back. Frowning, I paused. Several raised scars pulled my attention away from the fact that he was very naked and pressing against me. I hadn’t even noticed them before, but I’d never touched him like this either.

Suddenly dread slithered through my veins, and reality crashed down on me. Julia’s words rang in my ears.Cole needs to tell you about his past.

“What is it, Shae?” Cole cupped my face in his hands and pressed into me, his cock resting against my thigh.

I didn’t want to deal with the real world yet—one full of dark secrets, murder, and lies. Instead, I wanted to stay in the safe cocoon with Cole, but I understood life didn’t always work out that way.

“Can I see the tattoos on your back?”

A quick frown clouded Cole’s features, then he turned slowly.

“They’re beautiful. Whoever drew and inked them is a real artist.” I traced the skull with angel wings, a sword, and the much smaller tattoo near the tail of the panther’s body. Then my eyes drifted to another one. Although it was mostly hidden behind blue and white flames of fire, there was no mistaking it this time. It was me, but this one was slightly different from the artwork on his bike—tears were on my cheeks. The tattoo covered a long, thin scar that stretched from the flames into the black knife, where droplets of blood hung off the blade.

Cole grunted, then spun around and grabbed my wrists. He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. Vulnerability flickered in his gaze, and my chest tightened.

I peeked at him, then pushed up on my tiptoes and gently kissed him. Studying his face, I gathered my courage to ask him a question knowing full well that his answer had the ability to crush my soul.

“Cole, why do you have scars all over your back?” I whispered.

ChapterNineteen

Cole’s expression quickly morphed from relaxed to grim.

A phone vibrated against the counter, and I spotted Cole’s near the coffee pot. Relief flooded through him, his shoulders visibly relaxing as he backed up, then scooped up his cell. “I have to take this.”

Cole answered while he gathered his jeans and T-shirt, then strolled to the bedroom. His voice was hushed as he walked away.

While he was occupied, I dressed in my pajamas again, then busied myself making some hamburgers for a late lunch. My appetite had been complete shit lately, but sex with Cole had made my world a little better. Either I was fucked in the head, or Cole’s touch was so different than Ibrahim’s, it didn’t send me into a full-on anxiety attack. Even if I’d had a difficult time, I wouldn’t have stopped. I’d struggled with depression, but I was bound and determined that the rape wouldn’t stop me from having a good sex life. It was more the fact that Cole had been so weird around me after he’d shared his feelings that had confused me.

The hamburgers sizzled in the skillet, and I flipped them over. Mulling over the scars on Cole’s back, I chewed on my bottom lip. Julia had made it clear she couldn’t share what her son had lived through, and I didn’t want to push Cole, but I needed to know what I was getting myself into.

Fifteen minutes later, Cole’s footfalls alerted me that he was returning. It was perfect timing since the hamburgers were an excellent medium pink. I flipped the gas burner off and grabbed a few paper plates from the cabinet.

“Hey.” Cole slipped his arms around my waist, pressing the front of his body into my back as he nuzzled my neck.

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