Page 28 of Confessions of a Christmasholic

Gus didn’t think it was fair to convict Sutton on such flimsy evidence. ‘Rosie is four, Moira,’ he stated, struggling to hold on to his patience.

‘She’s a very observant and bright four!’ Moira shot back. Moira thought the twins walked on water and that they could do no wrong. Gus gripped the bridge of his nose, pushing away his irritation. Yes, he understood how protective Moira was over his children, but nobody was more so than him. Did she really think he’d put his precious children in the care of a drug addict?Seriously?

Sure, hiring Sutton the way he did was unconventional, but something in her called to him. She was tough, but vulnerable, trying her best to make the best of a bad situation. She was broke, homeless and in a tight spot, and if he could help her, he would.

‘Look, I admit she didn’t give me the best first impression,’ Gus explained, ‘but I understand more about her situation than you do.’

She’d drunkenly told him about her tough childhood – he’d had one too, so he could empathise – and he understood how her friend’s betrayal rocked her. It was tough to discover the one person you thought had your back, didn’t. Sutton hadn’t mentioned her past again, and he understood. It was too personal and too hurtful to be shared with someone who was barely more than a stranger, and her boss. Tequila loosened her tongue, and she’d be mortified if she knew he knew. Sutton didn’t like to be perceived as weak, or in need of sympathy.

He got it. He didn’t like feeling that way either.

‘Moi, I went through her backpack. I did not find anything that pointed to her being a drug user. She’s clear-eyed, and clean.’

Besides, and he wouldn’t tell Moira this, she didn’t have money to spend on drugs. He gritted his teeth at the thought of her having less than fifty pounds to her name. It made him feel sick, and very pissed off. Girls, and women of all ages, had found themselves in worse situations with more money.

Gus rubbed his jaw. ‘I called six people in South Africa, and they all gave me good references,’ Gus told Moira, wanting to get back to Sutton and the kids. ‘I promise you, she’sfine.’

‘Okay. I trust your judgement.” Moira cocked her head and her green eyes, Kate’s eyes, turned speculative. ‘You like her,’ she stated.

Oh,fuck. Not this now. For the last six months, Moria’d been pushing him to date more, to think about what the rest of his life would look like. He couldn’t deal with another when-are-you-going-to-start-dating-again conversation.

‘Moira,’ he pleaded.

‘You need a long-term, stable partner, someone who will help you raise the twins.’

He looked around, wondering how much it would hurt to throw himself out of the nearest window. ‘I have you to help me raise the twins,’ he spluttered.

‘What if I find a lovely lover and I relocate to Cyprus with him?’ Moira demanded.

Wait!What?‘Is that a possibility?’

‘It might be,’ Moira crisply replied. ‘The point is, you need something more than casual sex, Gus.’

He did? Uh…not in this lifetime. And what did she know about his sex life? ‘I’m not an idiot, Gus, I know you see a woman in Kendal for no-strings sex.’

And there went the power to his brain. He wasn’t a prude, but he wasn’t comfortable talking about this with the woman who’d birthed his wife. ‘You need happy sex, loving sex, wild sex—’

La la la la la.

The image of Sutton, dressed only in the blue bra and matching, skimpy panties, flashed across his mind. Her skin looked soft and creamy, and he wanted to know how it felt to have her legs locked around his hips. But she was his nanny, she was in a vulnerable position, and he wouldnottake advantage of her.

He didn’t want a relationship and having one, havinganything, with Sutton was impossible. He lifted his hand, needing to move this conversation along. Or to blow it to smithereens with some C-4. ‘Right, I’m done discussing this.’

Moira ignored him. ‘And, now that I know she isn’t a druggie, I think Sutton looks like a nice girl.’

Christ on a bike!‘She’s mynanny, Moira. End of.’

‘You’re a young, good-looking guy and you need to move on.’ An arrow hit his chest, its point as sharp as it was three years ago. How could he explain to her, explain to anyone, that he felt guilty fornotfeeling guilty about having sex, and one-night stands? He should, but he didn’t. Not after what—aarrgh!

‘Just don’t close yourself up to the possibilities…’

‘Bye, Moira.’ Gus turned his back to her and walked away. She couldn’t keep talking to fresh air. Then again, this was Moira, and anything was possible.

‘Tell Sutton I’m sorry, and that I’ll swing by to apologise! Maybe she can come to tea.’

He lifted a hand in acknowledgement and strode into the kitchen, then the mudroom, grabbed his coat and hurried out the back door. Then the humour of the situation hit him, and he started to laugh. Only Moira could get it so wrong. Sutton met him by the bonnet of the car, looking adorably confused and very worried. ‘What’s her problem?’ she crisply demanded, and he heard the fear in her voice.

Gus gripped the bonnet of the car, and leaned forward, his laughter louder than before. Sutton gripped the lapel of his coat and shook it. ‘What happened inside? Why did she treat me like I was something disgusting she found on her shoe?’

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