I wasn’t sure if that was a stab at me or not. Right from the beginning, Jerry had wanted me to stand alongside him. He’d even offered to give me shares, because I’d been with him from day one, but I knew nothing about business. I didn’t want to get bogged down with the admin of it all. I liked being creative, I liked coming up with ideas to promote the company. I liked workinginit and notonit.
“It’s been, what, ten years? You deserve to sit back a little,” Isaid.
Ten years we’d worked together, both straight out of education. Although we had attended the same college, we hadn’t known each other then. We’d met in a bar, he’d spilled his drink on me, we got chatting, and the rest, as they say, ishistory.
“Yeah, but I’m only thirty, not retirement age yet,” he said, with alaugh.
“Is there something else you want to do? Maybe play a littlegolf?”
“Golf! Yeah, can you just see those stuck-up fuckers allowing me on a golf course? I’d walk around with a cigarette in my mouth,swearing.”
“Mmm, maybenot.”
“Another ten years, and then I’ll sell out completely, travel abit.”
“When was the last time you had aholiday?”
He had to think. “Fucking yearsago.”
“Take a holidaythen.”
“I might. These skinny legs haven’t seen the sun for a long time. I can just see me and Mum sitting on a beach in the Caribbean.” He gave me awink.
It occurred to me then, like me, Jerry didn’t seem to have many friends. He’d forgone life in the pursuit of a successful business. I only hoped the payout had been worththat.
“I’ll see you Monday then, and thanks for the ride,” I said as I climbed from thecar.
I put on a load of washing, grabbed a meal from the freezer to defrost, and changed into jeans and a jumper. The apartment was chilly, so I wrapped a blanket around me and curled up on the sofa. As predicted, there was nothing worth watching on the TV, so I scanned through Netflix to find amovie.
* * *
It waswith trepidation that I entered the office on Monday morning. Maybe I was overthinking the sly glances thrown my way, or imagining the whispers behind hands. For the first time ever, I felt veryuncomfortable.
My stomach turned every time I heard the lift ping, alerting me that someone had arrived on my floor. I wasn’t sure whether Mackenzie would even visit that day. I hid myself away in my office, only leaving to grab a cup of coffee, and only when I thought the coast was clear. Jenny had offered to do a lunch run for me, which I’d declined. My stomach was too knotted toeat.
I hated the tension, I hated that I allowed that tension to grow as each hour passed. It was only when I noticed the clock on wall showing five that I began to relax. Jenny popped her head around the door to wish me a goodnight, and as each person started to leave, the automatic lightingdimmed.
I preferred to work late. If I could bring myself to do it, I’d start later in the morning and work into the night. It was peaceful and an escape from a lonely apartment. I sighed as I recalled Jerry’s words. Maybe I needed to get a hobby, or a life, something that took me out of the office and focussed my brain onfun.
I closed down my laptop and packed it away in my briefcase. As I did, I chuckled bitterly. I even took my workhome.
I stood by the lift, not watching the direction of its travel. When the doors slid open, I entered and pressed for ground. A tear formed in my eye and when I blinked, it slid down my cheek, followed by another. I didn’t bother to wipe it away, nor did I notice the lift start to travel up onefloor.
The doors slid open, and as I had my head bowed, all I saw was a pair of black brogues. I looked up, straight to the face ofMackenzie.
“Lauren, are you okay?” he asked, concern laced hisvoice.
“Of course, why shouldn’t Ibe?”
“Because you’recrying.”
I raised my hand and brushed the tearsaway.
“Is there any point in saying I have something in myeye?”
He stepped into the lift, too close to me for comfort. The doors closed, but neither of us pressed forground.
Before my brain could register, he raised a hand and used his thumb to wipe under myeye.