Page 35 of More Than Enough

It was a simple question. It required a simple answer, but instead of answering with words, Elizabeth answered her mom with tears. Again, her tears were like a broken damn. She had to put her coffee cup down or she would spill it. All the stress she felt from her talk with Stacey came bubbling to the top. Her mother reached over and wrapped her daughter in a hug, said nothing, and just let her cry. Eventually, Elizabeth’s tears dried up and she calmed down. Mrs. Parks patiently waited for her daughter to start talking.

“It’s been a hard day, Mom.” Elizabeth pulled a tissue from the box on the table and wiped her eyes and blew her nose. Her mother just nodded her head and waited.

Elizabeth knew her mother, and knew she was going to wait for Elizabeth to talk. If she wanted to leave and not talk, that would be fine too. It always amazed her how patient her mother was and how easy it was to talk to her. She should have been a psychologist.

“I screwed things up, Mom.” She paused, not really wanting to say anything, but knew she had to. “Jacob and I have been talking, and we like each other. We did things, and now I need to stop things. Break things off between us. He will either hate me anyway once I tell him about the baby, but he sure doesn’t need to waste his time on me.”

Tears started again, but Elizabeth was determined to finish what she wanted to say. “I always make wrong decisions, Mom. Why? Why can’t I just be like other girls? Have fun if I want. Have a great guy like me. But no! I get pregnant doing what everyone has done, and when a great guy does end up liking me, I screw that up also! I am such an idiot!” Tears fell again, and she reached out for another tissue, wiping violently at her face and nose.

Elizabeth’s mom lowered her head, breaking their eye contact and let out a heavy sigh. Looking back into her daughters face she gave her a frustrated shake of her head. “There is nothing I can say except that you need to stop being so hard on yourself. What other girls do, or don’t do, doesn’t matter anymore. You made your choices. You made mistakes, but you are not an idiot. You made a bad choice, and it sounds like that is continuing. Look, your dad and I weren’t born yesterday. We know you did things in college, that don’t make us happy.” With this she gestured toward her daughter’s belly. “And we also know you didn’t come home last night. With what you just said, I figure you spent the night with Jacob, and he didn’t know about your pregnancy. That was wrong. You need to fix it. If he is upset and decides not to see you again, that is his decision. You need to worry about yourself. The drama has got to go.”Her eyes held Elizabeth’s.

“I know, Mom. He asked me to come for dinner tonight. I’ll go over now and tell him everything. You’re right. He deserves to know the truth.”

Elizabeth stood up and leaned over to hug her mom. “I love you, Mom.” She gave her an extra big squeeze, left the kitchen through the back door, and headed toward Jacob’s before she lost her nerve.

Elizabeth paused at the back door but didn’t have to wait long before it opened. Jacob stood there in black running shorts and a tight, gray T-shirt which showed off the outline of his chest and abs. Elizabeth looked away, took a breath, then looked back into his sea-blue eyes.

“Hi.” She gave him an unsure crooked smile. “Can we talk?” He nodded and took a step back into his kitchen.

“No, I’d rather speak out here.” Jacob shrugged and gave her a confused look but followed her.

She stopped at the couch, decided against sitting down and went over to the railing instead. Jacob grabbed her from behind and turned her to face him. He reached out to pull her closer, but she stepped back and put her hand up to keep him from touching her or getting too close.

“Please don’t. I need to tell you something, and if you hug me, or kiss me, I’ll lose my nerve.”

Jacob looked at her. The hurt and confusion were clear in his eyes. “Elizabeth, what’s going on? What are you not telling me?”

She took a deep breath, gaining courage. “Your sister came to the boutique today. She told me Kristen said something to you.” She watched his face.

Understanding dawned on his handsome features. “Yeah, she did. Is it true?”

Taking another deep breath, Elizabeth turned away from him and leaned on the railing of the deck. “Yes. It’s true. I’m sorry. I should have told you.” She turned her head to look at him. There was fury in his face—almost to the point of hatred.

“Jacob?” Elizabeth, surprised at the look she saw, stepped closer to him, and placed her hand on his arm.

“Seriously?! Why would you do that? I thought I knew you!” Jacob roughly brushed her hand from his arm and took a step away from her.

“Wait!” Elizabeth tried to figure out what his comments were about. It didn’t make sense. “I don’t understand. Why would I do what?” She knew she needed to clear things up, but how could this be a reaction to her being pregnant?

“An abortion, Elizabeth! When you’re pregnant, sometimes people take the easy way out and get an abortion. I know that is the choice you made.”

“Who told you that? Wait, is that what Kristen said?”

Jacob looked at her with his eyes wide and shooting daggers at her.

“Jacob, yes, I am pregnant. But I didn’t have an abortion. I thought about it and thought about it.”

“Was it that much on your mind?” It was like he was accusing her.

“Yes. It was.” Elizabeth breathed hard and placed her hand on her head. She felt a headache coming. She was already tired of all this extra stress.

“Look, honestly, I didn’t know what I was going to do. I thought an abortion would be an easy decision, but it wasn’t, but I also couldn’t picture being a mother. Either way was gonna suck for me. If I had an abortion, I would live with that forever. My parents would have been disappointed, and I would have lost you.”

She paused and touched the side of his face making him look in her eyes. “But now, I have decided to keep it. I just found you. I like this. I like us.” Elizabeth dropped her hand and put more separation between them. “I’m gonna be a mom. It’s been a lot for me to take in, but I’m good with it now. But we can’t be together. It’s not fair to you.”

He walked to her and placed his hand on her arm. “Why do you think we can’t be together? We can still see where this goes.” He looked at her and pulled her to him kissing her lightly on her lips. It was a sweet, tender kiss. One she wished would never end, but when it did, she put space between their lips.

“I can’t and won’t do that to you. I’m sorry. We need to stop. I must focus on what I need to do, and I don’t need to put you through that also.”