Page 5 of Ms. Lead

Hope.

“Mr. Bellamy? Are you okay?” Forcing myself to focus, I see Bianca with a concerned look leaning toward me. Oh no. Concern from her too. “We’re at your hotel. This is the Bliss Casino where you’ll be staying.”

That was a lot quicker than I expected. Or maybe it took forever. I’ve been in my own head the entire time. Days could have gone by.

I shake off the mental cobwebs and nod. “Right. Thanks.”

“Bye, Mr. Belly,” the little girl chirps in a sing-song melody.

That makes me laugh. I’ve never been called “Mr. Belly” before.

“You can call me Oli if you want.” Now that I’m so close to being able to sleep, my mood is lifting. Plus, I have to admit these kids are pretty decent for toddlers.

“I like Mr. Belly.”

“I kind of do, too,” I whisper. “Right. Mr. Belly it is.” I give her a wink as I open my door, making her giggle again. If I’ve done nothing else positive today, I’ve made a child giggle.

My bag is already on the scorching hot sidewalk when I get out of the car, and Bianca stands next to it, arm resting casually on the handle. She looks so comfortable in this oppressive heat, her tanned skin glowing in the blazing sun. I get the sense she wants to say something about our initial connection, but that is not something I want to get into now or ever. I need to pretend it never happened if I have any chance of getting through this month unscathed. Spending time with Bianca could throw all of that into a tailspin. I have to deny my attraction to her.

“So, are you going to be my chauffeur this entire month? Or was today a one-off?” I try to keep the hope out of my voice and think I come off arrogant enough to pass.

Her pained expression lets me know I succeeded. I’m going straight to hell.

“I’m not sure, actually…” she hesitates. “Did I do something to upset you, Mr. Bellamy? I am sorry about the children coming along to meet you.”

“What? No. Not at all. The children were fine.” I can’t believe she came right out and asked that. I wasn’t expecting to be called out or confronted about my attitude. Especially not from a stranger. But then, Bianca doesn’t feel like a stranger. “I’m just fatigued. I’m sorry if I came across—”

“Oh, thank God,” she rests a hand on my arm, and something inside me ignites. It might be the smallest of pilot lights, but it’s a fire, nonetheless. And precisely what I didn’t want to happen. What can’t happen.

I physically force myself to step back and out of her reach, trying not to be too obvious about it, but I can tell by the frown on her lips that it’s hurt her.

God damn it. I can’t win. I can’t fucking win. My vision starts to blur again, and this time it’s welcome, because now I can’t see the results of my being a total jerk to this beautiful woman that doesn’t deserve it.

I need to get away from her. I can’t do this right now.

“Have someone email me with the arrangements. Thanks.” Turning away from her quickly and heading to the entrance, I can feel her gaze on my back as I go. I also feel her disappointment in me press on my shoulders. I’m surprised there’s room with all of my own discontent with myself taking up so much space.

Once I check in, I have a porter bring my bags up with me. Not because I’m that full of myself, but because my eyes are so bad right now, I can’t see the floor buttons on the lift, let alone room numbers. When we get to the room, I tip him, knowing at least what I’m giving him. I’ve learned to keep my money in a specific order in my wallet for situations like this. I’m generous anyway. He didn’t try to make small talk, and that’s worth a lot in my book.

I’ll be back to normal once I get some sleep. I keep telling myself that. Maybe if I say it enough, it will be true. Maybe.

Chapter Four

BIANCA

I KNEW I LOVED YOU

As I watch Oliver Bellamy turn and walk away from me to enter the hotel, I can’t help but wonder what the hell I did to deserve him acting like that toward me. For the life of me, I can’t think of anything. I barely said two words to him, and he’s been nothing but rude.

Sure, he apologized briefly just now, saying he was tired, but it didn’t feel like he meant it. Add to that his initial response to the kids coming along, and it doesn’t add up to him being a nice guy. Quite the opposite, actually.

Whatever happened between us at baggage claim is starting to feel like a figment of my wild imagination. I wonder if I didn’t make the entire thing up in my head.

There was a connection there. I know it. What happened to it? Where did it go? I have no idea. But now I’m left with this version of him that is rude and self-important, and it feels wrong somehow. Like it’s not real. He’s putting on an act to come off as an asshole.

But why? Why would someone do that? Who wants to be thought of as rude? Did he only like me when he didn’t know who I was? Is my being a driver not good enough for him? That doesn’t feel right, either. He doesn’t seem like the type that would judge people that way. But I can’t say that with any certainty, either. All of this is intuition. And my instincts are almost never wrong.

Well, I can’t say that either, considering I was jilted right before walking down the aisle five years ago. My instincts were way off on that one. My former fiancé, Colin, ran off with our wedding planner three days before we were to be married. I even ignored my brother, who told me that Colin wasn’t the type of person I thought he was. I should have listened or at least considered what he was saying. At the time, it was just a “feeling” he had, nothing concrete, so I dismissed it. Since then, saying I’ve got trust issues is an understatement. So, why am I letting this stranger bother me so much?

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