Page 59 of I Got You

“Let them bring it. We’ve got four kids and the two of us. They’ve got one dimension, and giant sticks up their asses.” He’s trying, and I force myself to look at him. He holds out his hand. “I’ve got a stockpile of whoop-ass of my own. We’ve got this.”

A solid knot forms in my throat as I slide my hand into his. His large, calloused hand surrounds mine, and only then do I feel just a little less scared about what lies ahead.

∞∞∞

Our ride to campus was silent as I tried to decompress, and Shane gave me the space to do it. He dropped me back off at the gym, and luckily, I didn’t have a class for another hour. I dashed into the locker room, tore off my clothes, and jumped into a leotard, ready to lose myself in my favorite escape.

Walking into the dark studio, I flip on the lights and hook my phone up to the sound equipment, scrolling to one of my favorite songs. I slip on my ballet shoes and stretch, trying to drown out the voices in my head and the thoughts about the battle that’s coming.

I face the mirror and take an account. I’m not the weak person I once was or the child whose mother was gone in the blink of an eye. It’s been years since I’ve let these old feelings threaten me, and here in this room, the only person I have to face is myself.

I turn the music loud and get lost in the movement that’s so familiar. I imagine it's how a bird feels, spreading its wings wide and soaring. It’s the rhythm of my heart, the one that calls to me when I’m spinning out of control and helps me find my way home.

I dance until I’m sweaty and out of breath, and like I’ve climbed back into my skin. With only a couple minutes before students arrive, I pull out my phone to check my messages and email, which I’ve ignored all morning. Scrolling through, I see another text from my ex.

Danny and I haven’t spoken since I left New York. He called and messaged me for weeks afterward, but slowly got the hint that I wouldn’t be returning either. Beyond that, it was a random text here or there.

It’s been a while, but I wasn’t surprised by his message of congrats on my marriage. It was the following messages expressing his shock that I married a football player and how we needed to catch up, and then how he missed dancing together that started to piss me off all over again. The man was always relentless when he wanted something but not so careful once he had it.

This time, he’s insistent that I call. He has an “opportunity” that’s too good to refuse. My curiosity is piqued, but not enough to forget the past.

Dancing with Danny was the time of my life. His skill and ability are unmatched. I discovered a whole new way of dancing with him. Dating Danny was great until it wasn’t, and I came home with a damaged ankle and a severed heart.

I don’t know if I want to crack any part of that old door open again, let alone with Danny. No part of me is interested in reconnecting with him, now or ever. That ship not only sailed, it sunk, but a small piece of me is curious about what this opportunity might be.

I stand as students file in, my mind drifting back to Danny’s message, and I can’t help but wonder what it would feel like to dance at that level again. I don’t even know if I could do it. I’m not in the shape I once was, and given the stiffness in my ankle after thirty minutes, I have serious doubts about my ankle holding up under intense training.

All of that, and I still can’t help but think about what it would be like to be on stage again. The music. The lights. The energy. Doing what my mother told me I was born to do…one more time.

∞∞∞

ME: What opportunity?

DANNY: Hey. You and me. The bright lights. One night only.

ME: Why me? You’ve got your pick of the litter.

DANNY: You know why. You’re the best.

ME: Not anymore.

DANNY: Lies.

DANNY: I’m still so sorry. Don’t let the past keep you from this. It’s a chance to give you back what I took. You’re amazing, Maggie. Everyone should get to see you dance.

ME: Thank you, but my life is full. I don’t have time and even if I did, I’m not what I used to be. Good luck. I know you’ll kill it.

DANNY: I’m not giving up.

Chapter 20

SHANE

I hear the garage door go up, and I’m like a lion waiting in the tall grass for its prey to make its way into the clearing. In this case, it’s a blue-eyed, one-dimpled little boy who’s about to get a taste of his own nasty medicine.

“Shaney, can we have a soda every night? Maggie never lets us have it.” Liv is propped up on the counter next to me while Garrett finishes his homework on the other, sipping a small cup of Coke that I split between them.

“Probably not. This is a special night.”

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