Page 34 of Tasting Darkness

I suck in a shuddering breath when Lycus cups my face in his hands, and I can feel the warmth of Darius' blood dripping on me, his face bleeding profusely.

“Come, Kalen. I will get you out of here. Let's get you cleaned up,” Lycus purrs. The sound usually soothes me, but not today. I’m not leaving Darius right now.

His emotions are implosive, and I worry he will harm himself. Our secret is out. He always hates himself for what he does to me, but today is worse because he has their added hate amplifying it through the bond.

I shake my head. “Go. I am fine,” I tell him, but his eyes move over my shoulder to Darius behind me, his eyes flicker, but I grab Lycus' face, turning his gaze back to me.

“Go,” I whisper.

“How can you even be near him after what he did?” Lycus demands, his voice coming out in a growl. He wants to kill him. Lycus doesn’t care that Darius is our mate. He only cares that he hurt Aleera and me.

“Because he didn't do it,” I tell him. Lycus snarls, not believing me, but I don’t care. I know Darius better than they do and understand him and the monster that lurks beneath his skin. They don’t need to understand it. They just need to accept that I forgive even this side of him, and they should too.

“How can you say that? He is as bad as the priests at the orphanage,” he spits at me. I shake my head and press closer to Darius.

“No. They are monsters. Darius is our mate,” I answer.

“Mates don't rape each other!” Lycus sneers, gripping my wrist to jerk me to my feet, but I pull my hand away.

“Kalen, now!” Lycus growls.

“Leave. I will be up soon, with OUR mate,” I tell him, and I feel Darius move as he shakes his head behind me.

“Lycus is right. You should go with him,” Darius whispers behind me.

“I’m not leaving you,” I tell him, not taking my eyes from Lycus, who still looks like he is going to rip me away from him. He flashes his canines at Darius before his eyes move back to mine.

“Fine. But keep him away from me, or I will fucking kill him!” Lycus snarls, then he opens a portal, stepping through it. I let out a breath when it closes, leaving me alone with Darius.

“He’s gone now,” I whisper to Darius as his arms encircle my waist, and he buries his face into the back of my neck. His body shakes as he squeezes me, hugging me tightly. His tears ran down my skin as he cried. Only I ever saw this side of him, and witnessed how broken he truly is.

“I’m sorry,” he kept whispering on repeat, pulling me closer like he is afraid to lose me, and he is. He fears nothing more than everyone abandoning him.

They always do. His mother left him after he accidentally killed his sister. She became comatose, and Darius cared for her, living with the guilt of the secret his mother kept saving him from his father.

Even if it weren't intentional, his father would have killed him for it. His father left him to raise himself. His father was too consumed with finding a cure. A cure for the plague he helped create that destroyed his family.

Darius was a boy, and it was an innocent mistake, yet he blamed himself for her death, for his mother’s. Just like he blamed himself for being the one that ended the world as it used to be. He blamed himself for the plague. Nothing I said convinced him otherwise, just like he blamed himself for Tobias’ twin's death. For Lycus, the only thing I never could figure out was the guilt he felt over me. I saw it on his face the day I met him, recognition. He knew me, but has never allowed that one secret to escape him.

Twisting in his grip, I straddle his lap, his sadness, guilt, and pain seeping into me hotter than any emotion I felt toward him. He kisses my chest and neck before resting his forehead against my collarbone. His breath is hot against my skin. “You should hate me. And I wish you did,” Darius murmurs.

“I couldn't hate you even if I wanted to. But I will let you make it up to me,” I tell him, and he pulls away and looks at me desperately. He will do whatever I ask. I knew Darius needed to make up for his sins, as he saw them, and needed to untaint what he tainted.

“Anything you want,” he says, and I cup his face in my hands. His stubble is rough against my palms, his black eyes searching mine. I could ask the man anything and knew he would oblige. Darius would kill for me and has. No one has blood on their hands like Darius Wraith. But he always had his reasons. He wasn’t a cold-blooded killer like the world perceived him as.

They saw a monster while I saw him. He was cruel and cold by nature, but inside, he loved fiercely and was protective. He wore the perception everyone gave him like armor and refused to let others in, knowing that was how everyone could also destroy him.

“Anything?” I ask him, and he nods, clutching me tighter and dragging me against him. His lips press to the center of my chest. He could never deny me, but I also never asked for anything either. But this time I would.

ChapterTwenty-Six

“Stop giving Aleera the devil's bane. Let her shred, Darius. Let her bond with us. I get why you don't want her to mark you, but you're punishing all of us by not letting her mark the rest of us. You’re punishing her,” I tell him, and he shakes his head against my chest.

“I can't let her mark me. You think I don't wish I could?” he says.

“She will forgive you. They all will.” I try to reason.

“You don't know that,” he says.

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