Page 3 of A Lesson In Beginning

Well, I supposed that wasn’t entirely true. I still had Ruth. If I could even call her family any longer. Both my parents and my in-laws were in prison alongside my soon to be ex-husband. The rage I felt at the havoc the Temple family had created boiled up inside of me, threatening to spill out. I could not let Samuel see that.

“Mommy will be right back, love.” I quickly slipped into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I took a deep breath and silently screamed with all my might, throwing my whole body into it as I doubled over in half, letting the anger fill me. My hands fisted, my toes curled into the cool tile floor, and the tears that had threatened to spill over at Nadia’s tirade finally slipped and slid from my eyes and down my cheeks.

Ruth had done exactly as the Bible had said, leaving her family and becoming one with her husband, leaving me in the dust in the wake of her choices. Of their choices.

And yet… it wasn’t that simple.

With my throat hurting from the exertion of not screaming out loud for all to hear, I sat on the edge of the bathtub, hunched over, while I let every emotion hit me. One after another, they wracked my body like the blow of a fist.

This would not do. I could not carry on this way with this rage inside of me.

So, I went back to the truth.

My family had committed atrocious acts in the name of God that left our community, our home, in shambles.

My husband was behind bars for the rest of his life, alongside what little family I had left.

I had no home to go back to in Zion.

I had no money.

I had no means of acquiring more money.

And I had a son to provide for in the absence of my husband.

I could not get my husband out of prison. I could not go back to the life I had once lived. So what was I to do?

Wiping the tears from my face, I took hold of the truth I knew I had to acknowledge, wrapping my arms around it with all the conviction I could muster.

I needed to leave here and go to the one person I had left.

It was time to talk to Ruth. I hoped I had just enough money left to provide airfare to Portland for the two of us. I was grateful that Ruth’s address had been in some of the paperwork from the lawyer.

It was time to leave this place and make a new life for my son. He deserved it.

Even if I didn’t.

CHAPTER 2

“Are we home now, Mommy?” Samuel muttered out sleepily as the taxicab came to a stop before a picturesque home that was more modern than any we had back home in Zion. The front porch lights were off, though a line of small lights lined the concrete path up to the front door on either side, giving it a glow that felt far too ostentatious, and yet welcoming all at the same time.

“We are here, little love. It’s time to wake up and —”

“Pay up, lady.” The astringent and all together dismissive tone of the taxi driver cut my words off. I pulled the money from my purse, handing it to the driver before quickly unfastening Samuel from his car seat. “Let’s move it, lady.”

Once I had Samuel safely standing in the driveway, I turned to remove our belongings from the vehicle. The cab driver had already pulled our single suitcase from the trunk, and I quickly removed Samuel’s car seat from the vehicle.

“Thank you so much, Sir. I appreciate —”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” With a slam of the door, he sped off into the night, leaving the two of us standing there. The chill of the night had just settled. Still riding the anxiety-riddled high of dealing with a large airport, I ignored the breeze, unusually cool for this late into the summer.

“Come along, Samuel.” I tugged him along slowly, his tired body barely awake even after all the hubbub and chaos of so many people. I had never in my life seen so many bodies crammed into such a small space. It was enough to make me yearn for the quiet of Zion. Not that it mattered now.

We marched up the sidewalk towards the dimly lit house, Samuel toddling sleepily along the way. It broke my heart not to just scoop him up in my arms and carry him, but I just couldn’t manage the luggage and car seat and him. So, as quickly as we could, we made our way to the front door.

Mustering every ounce of courage I had, I lifted my hand to the door, pressing the plastic button and listening with bated breath as the sound of the doorbell chimed from within.

A small voice inside of my mind grew worried about what kind of reaction my sister would have. I quickly shoved that voice down deep inside of me, thinking of all the times I had come to Ruth’s aid over the years. It’s what any good big sister would do, but Ruth had made life troublesome in our youth, and that had only increased when we both became fully grown women. Still, I had done my Christian duty by her, helping her to navigate those early years of womanhood and even offering to help her after she became a wife in her own right. Did she accept my help, though? No, of course she didn’t.

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