Page 69 of A Lesson In Beginning

“Would you be willing to tell me about what happened? Back in your younger days, I think is how you put it?”

“It’s not a pretty story, Joel. The world Levi, Ruth, and I come from is not a pretty story at all. And I don’t want to change your perception of me.”

He placed a hand on my arm and squeezed reassuringly. “That could never happen. We are not the people we were raised to be, or the places we come from. But you are a sum of your parts. Your past is what makes you who you are. And I’d love to get to know the story of how this incredible, strong, vivacious woman came to be here, in my life.”

“Are you sure you want to know?”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything. I want to know everything about you.”

Over the course of the next two hours, I told him the story of what life was like in Zion. The ups, the downs, the indoctrination, the arranged marriage. While I didn’t go into too many details, it certainly painted a picture of the life that I had lived. Through it all, he stayed calm, collected, and, most importantly, non-judgmental. I stayed away from speaking about what happened there at the end, when the FBI came; I wasn’t ready to share that pain. Not with anyone. Not yet.

Early in my re-telling, he reached for my hand, taking it between both of his, and offering me comfort as I spoke. There was no interruption, none of his thoughts or opinions. He simply made space for me to speak and be heard.

By the end, I was near tears, not from recounting my earlier years, but from the sheer weight of his acknowledgement of me, and the acceptance that followed. At every turn, this man showed me what it was to be seen. I felt safe. And that was a miracle in and of itself.

CHAPTER 20

“I don’t know why I pictured you living in a house.” My words were nearly rhetorical as I slowly looked around the expanse of Joel’s loft apartment. It was right in the middle of downtown, not far from The Temple. He lived on the top floor.

“It’s hard to find a house this close to downtown, so I chose an apartment. Granted, the loft has the space and feel of a larger home. Not so boxy, like you would find in many apartments.” He shut and locked the door behind us, allowing me a moment to take in the grandeur of his home. It wasn’t extravagant or necessarily as modern as Levi and Ruth’s home, but it had a class and elegance of its own that nearly took my breath away.

“I mean, look at this place!”

“I do, often. I live here.”

“You have an entire wall and part of a ceiling that’s nothing but windows. How is that even safe? What if it storms?” I walked across the open concept kitchen and living area to the wall of windows that spanned floor to ceiling and beyond, looking out over the downtown city lights.

“It’s actually quite beautiful when it storms. The rain sounds amazing against the glass and creates this almost underwater feel to the whole place during really heavy downpours.”

“Is that why you chose it?”

“No, although it was a high selling point when I bought the place. Look right there.” He came up behind me, pointing over my shoulder slightly to the left.

“It’s the hospital.”

“Exactly. With my line of work, it pays to be so close to the hospital. I can be there in minutes, rather than the hours it can take some doctors. When an emergency comes in, I can be right there. And my patients are too important to be further away from. At least for now.” The fact that he cared so much about the little lives he helped touched a part of my heart, deeply tucked away. I felt the same about my son. His happiness, his life, mattered so much more than my own. I would do anything, give anything, to see him happy and fulfilled. Hearing those sentiments echoed in their own way by Joel only reassured me he was the right person to be with in this situation.

“Would you like something to drink before we begin?”

“I’d love a glass of water, if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all.” Following him into the kitchen, I set my purse on the table. The kitchen was homey, as opposed to the more industrial feel that Ruth and Levi’s home sported. Instead of the stainless steel and overly white decor, his kitchen — his entire home, really — was decorated richly in greens and earthy browns that gave the place a cozy feeling, almost a warmth, like home. His cabinets were a beautiful, rich green, offsetting the natural wood countertops perfectly.

“Here you are.” He handed me the glass, and I took a slow sip, my eyes scanning the apartment again. I noted the sheer number of plants that decorated and accented virtually every part of the open room.

“You have so many plants.”

“I kill more than you’d ever guess, but I enjoy being close to nature when I can be. And since I’m in the heart of the city, it makes me feel good to be doing some small part in cleaning up the air. Even if it’s from inside my home. I do have a small garden on the rooftop that I keep along with a few other tenants, but my focus is mostly here in my home.”

“You’re quite an intriguing person, Joel Whitlock. Full of surprises.”

“I like to keep you on your toes.” He shot me a wink, but I was not about to be outdone.

“Hmm, it was my understanding that you preferred to keep me naked and spread eagle on a bed for you to tease and torment. Or did I get that wrong?” Tapping my finger against my chin, I played at puzzlement.

“You’re quite the brat, Adah Price. Don’t you dare stop it, though. I love me some good witty banter.”

“Perhaps it’s me who likes to keep you on your toes.” He laughed loudly, the sound ringing out through the room, and I had to admit, I liked teasing him.

---