Page 131 of Third and Ten

JD

IT WAS, OK.

I sigh as I toss my phone into the cupholder in my truck, and it begins ringing a second later. “Blake the Snake is calling,” the audio system announces.

I hit the phone button on my steering wheel and answer. “WHAT?”

“Tell me you finally closed the deal.”

I groan. Might as well rip this Band-Aid off. “In a sense. We’re moving in together.”

“You’re what?” he chokes out.

“She came over last night, and it turns out that most of this was a result of some miscommunication. And then once I realized how much I enjoyed waking up next to her this morning, I suggested we make it a permanent thing.”

“Wait, let me get this straight. You finally got Tenley to spend the night, and all you did was talk?”

I know he’ll be disappointed in a minute, so I might as well mess with him first. “Sure. We talked…in bed.”

“So, you finally scored?”

“Your interest in what does and does not happen in my bed is starting to get a little creepy, man,” I say, enjoying his frustration.

He clicks his tongue. “And you’re obviously deflecting.”

“Maybe.” I’m holding back laughter at this point.

“Dude, you’re pathetic.”

“Just wait, there’s more,” I deadpan.

“What, does she not realize that she’ll have to put out if you’re living together?”

“Don’t worry. She understands that sex will be part of the arrangement once she moves in.”

“She does?”

“Well, yeah. We’ll be married by then, so it won’t be an issue for either of us.”

“You’ll be WHAT?” he yells so loudly that I have to turn the volume down.

I chuckle at his expense. “I suggested that we get married before the custody hearing. And Tenley agreed.”

He’s practically wheezing. “Married? But you weren’t even on speaking terms twenty-four hours ago!”

“Like I said, we made up. It was a lot easier to hear her out once she started undressing.”

I’m still laughing while his tone is pleading. “You’re totally serious, aren’t you? JD, please…don’t rush into this. I know you want to help her get Ethan back for good, but this is a disaster waiting to happen. I can’t guarantee that a wedding will be enough to sway the judge. And how can you be so sure that Tenley won’t change her mind? Or that you won’t get stuck in a custody battle of your own if you have kids together and things don’t work out?”

“Look, Tenley’s a very analytical woman. If she thinks this is a good idea, who am I to pass up the opportunity?” I drive up to the school, almost forgetting to park in the “Reserved for the Assistant Principal” spot in front.

“Okay, but what’s the hurry?”

“We love each other. We want to raise Ethan together. And we want to cohabitate and have a lot of sex. Why shouldn’t we get married?”

One of the students passing by on the sidewalk in front of me gives me the side-eye, so I switch the call to my phone. “Maybe it won’t make a difference in the outcome of the custody hearing, but I’d still like to do things in what I believe is the right order, and I need to be a good role model for Ethan. I want us to officially become a family as soon as possible. Is that so hard to understand?”

“This isn’t just a quick fix, man. I believe that Tenley loves you, I do. And I know that Ethan idolizes you. I just don’t want to see you get stuck in a situation that you’ll regret within a few years,” he pleads. “You can’t jump into a marriage based on an infatuation and expect it to work out.”

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