Page 5 of Fiendish Ways

PTSD hit so hard and fast, Nebraska saw red. Nebraska reacted out of pure survival. He turned and swung. His fist connected. It hurt more than he expected, snapping him from his moment of terror.

Cree jumped back and covered his eye. He turned away and sat on the settee. Nebraska couldn’t tell if he had hurt Cree that badly or if Cree tried getting his temper under control. Either thought made Nebraska feel sick.

He followed Cree. “Oh, my God. Are you okay? I’m so sorry.” He straddled Cree’s lap without thinking and tried prying Cree’s hand away from his face. “Let me see. I’m sorry. Let me see.”

Cree dropped his hand. His eye was red and watering.

Nebraska’s heart tried turning a cartwheel in his chest. “Holy shit. I feel terrible.” In his growing panic, Nebraska kissed Cree’s eye, as if he could make it better. When he realized what he had done, Nebraska froze with his lips pressed to the corner of Cree’s eye. His heart skipped a beat and then raced. Nebraska didn’t know what to do. He knew he should pull away, but he didn’t.

Then Cree’s arms encircled him. His hands slid up Nebraska’s back, urging him closer.

Nebraska’s lips moved lower. He kissed Cree’s cheek. His heart beat so hard and fast, he couldn’t get oxygen to his brain. Before he knew what happened, his mouth landed on the corner of Cree’s mouth. For a moment, neither of them moved. Then Cree turned his head. Their lips met. Nebraska sucked in a ragged breath. The world exploded into passion. Cree’s tongue filled Nebraska’s mouth. Everything ceased to exist except Cree. His kiss was everything Nebraska expected. He was rough and hungry. Cree treated Nebraska like he had been waiting his entire life to kiss him. Nebraska’s eyes burned behind his closed lids. Until that moment, he hadn’t realized the depths of his longing. He hadn’t realized how badly he wanted to be loved.

“You should stop me,” Cree said between kisses.

Nebraska ignored Cree’s ridiculous claim. He couldn’t get enough.

“Tell me no, Nebraska. I’m serious. You’re a good person. I’m not. You don’t want this.”

Cree’s half-hearted objections had Nebraska pulling away. “It’s okay. You don’t have to spare my feelings. I know you could have anyone.”

“No. You could have anyone. I don’t want you to settle for me because you’re trapped here.”

A laugh burst from Nebraska without his permission. “Do you think I’m trapped here? I could’ve chosen to leave at any time. Maybe someone would’ve been ordered to kill me, but I’m not afraid of that. I’m afraid of spending the rest of my life every bit as unloved as when you found me.”

Nebraska climbed from Cree’s lap. He wouldn’t force this. Cree had kissed him back. That was more than Nebraska ever dreamed. He wouldn’t hurt his own feelings by trying for more.

“Come on. Show me whatever you planned to show me. It seems I’ve outstayed my welcome. I may as well have a job.”

Cree snagged his waist before he got away. Nebraska found himself trapped between Cree’s knees and inside his unbreakable hold. His intense gaze held Nebraska’s stare. “Don’t walk away thinking I don’t want you, because I do. You’re all I want. I just need to know I’m really what you want.”

All of Cree’s denials made Nebraska wonder who he really tried to convince. Nebraska needed room to think. “I need air.” Nebraska untangled himself and headed for the bedroom door with his heart in his throat. He was so confused. Cree kissed him like he wanted him, but then tried talking Nebraska into not kissing him. It was all too much. Nebraska got overwhelmed easily under the slightest bit of confrontation. Too many years of unresolved abuse had left him an anxious mess. He just needed a minute to reevaluate before he ended up running for his life… and then likely losing it.

Chapter Four

Cree stared into space for much longer than necessary. Nebraska didn’t realize it, but Cree had come from even worse abuse than him. Not that it was a competition. He got where he had gone wrong in their conversation. Turning things over in his mind a million times had shown him exactly which wrong words he had used. Cree had made it sound like—despite his claims to the contrary—he didn’t, in fact, want Nebraska. Otherwise, he would have just gone for it and then told Nebraska it was okay if he decided to leave one day. Cree only wanted him to be happy.

When Nebraska didn’t return, Cree finally went in search of him. He followed the sound of laughter down the hall to the upstairs sitting room. Angel, King, and Nebraska were playing a trivia game. Some of the other guys were gathered around to watch. Cree wasn’t surprised. King and Nebraska were both geniuses. It was a sight to behold. He had watched them play this game before. They both knew everything about everything.

“Who’s winning?”

Angel turned a laughing gaze Cree’s way.

“Are you getting a black eye?”

Cree ignored Angel’s question. It took everything he had not to look Nebraska’s way.

Finally, Angel gave up and motioned King and Nebraska’s way. “They’re tied and I’m getting my ass handed to me. So, I’ve decided to make things interesting.”

Nebraska’s sexy green gaze turned his way. He looked happy. “If I win, Angel gets to tattoo King with anything of my choosing. If King wins, he gets to choose my first tattoo.”

Cree groaned. He hated the idea of anyone marking Nebraska’s skin, mostly because of the pain. No pain should ever touch Nebraska again. But it wasn’t his skin and Cree had no right to say no. “I can’t watch this. I’ll be on the patio.”

Laughter followed him out the door to the upstairs deck. Cree took a deep breath as the night air washed over him. Archer had chosen a truly beautiful place for them to live. It was nothing but gorgeous trees and water. The place was peaceful. They needed that.

He grabbed a lounge chair and sat. With his gaze locked on the full moon, he pulled out a laced cigar. They were in for the night and Nebraska was happy. Cree could relax and let go for a few. The second he lit up, Archer stepped outside. He filled the lounge next to Cree.

“I thought I’d find you out here.”

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