Page 48 of A Reckless Memory

The trip had flayed my insides raw, and Ansen’s presence was comforting. He didn’t look at me like I was a payday. He hadn’t then, and he wasn’t now. And we were no longer engaged.

Was I deluding myself? Was I looking for an excuse not to run next time?

Was I hoping for a next time?

He hadn’t moved, looking around the living room with the peaked ceiling and rustic interior. I went for a cozy Western feel, decades more updated than Daddy’s place. The kitchen was on the other side, a big open area where I envisioned the large family I once dreamed of gathering. I’d tried to talk myself out of the style and had failed.

“How was the visit with your dad?” I took the eggs from him and crossed to the kitchen.

I thought he’d sit at the island while I started pulling out seasoning for the steaks, but he leaned against the counter behind me, crossing one boot over the other. “Good. We drove across most of the county on Saturday.” He chuckled. “We’d randomly park, so he could tell Emmaline and Vaden stories about what he and his siblings got up to at various places.”

Smiling, I seasoned the steaks. How amazing would those memories be? All I’d gotten was what should’ve been and what could’ve been. “Sounds nice. How many siblings does he have?”

“Two brothers and a sister. All three live in Coal Haven.”

“Did he talk to any of them? Cameron?” I nudged Ansen out of the way so I could get the cast iron pan for the meat.

“Actually...yeah. All of them. First, Uncle Cameron. I stayed back to do chores. That way, if shit went south, I wouldn’t make it worse. Archer’s more diplomatic than me. Also, I’m not ready yet.”

I gave him an understanding smile. “He can be intimidating.”

“Archer said he thought Uncle Cameron almost cried.”

I spun on him. “What?” My boss was a stern man. The only emotion I’d seen from him other than his usual stoic expression was irritation, and we all strived to avoid that. Otherwise, he kept to himself.

“I think there were a lot of general regrets about time apart from all of us this weekend.”

I nodded at the roughness in his voice. “I might have to join that club.”

“That bad? Or should I say, your visit went that good?”

“He told me again what a great kid you are.”

He didn’t crack a smile at Daddy calling him a kid. “Sorry. I don’t know what I did to be the apple of his eye.”

“You stood up to him. Looked at him without fear. Had a passion for horses and earning top dollar. You don’t bullshit, Ansen. That goes a long way with Daddy—and he didn’t have to raise you. That seems to go further.”

“Raising me would’ve been easier than raising you, from what I heard—if the story about the horse races with your friends is true.”

I snickered. “Guilty.”

His grin was lopsided. “Setting up a betting ring in fifth grade, Aggie?” My laughter grew. “I was going to ask you about that when I heard Austen ask Wilder if he had to arrest you yet.”

“Come on now. I mellowed out by the time I was out of high school.” By then, I’d wanted to be useful. I wanted attention for what I could do, like my brothers. “Besides, I’m sure you gave me some competition in the rebellious kid category, slick.”

“Not at all.” His eyes danced when he smirked. “I was an angel.”

“How convenient your dad is back in Texas, scorpion-shoes boy.”

“Isn’t it a shame?” He went to my pantry. “What do you want with the steak?”

His broad back filling the opening gave me pause. The man had an ass and wore jeans designed to show it off. He bent to check out the options, and I gave myself a mental shake.

Quit staring. “Whatever you want.”

He quirked a look over his shoulder, his eyes full of promise. “You sure about that?”

My mouth went dry. Yes.

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