Page 40 of Blackout

‘The bartending job I have, I can’t do it anymore,’ Addison explained to everyone in the room. But was she willing to give up more information about herself?

‘Why not?’ My grandfather grilled my sister.

‘It makes me sick,’ she fired back at him. They haven’t always gotten along. It was why she had never put in any hours at the bakery before the last four weeks. Grandpa only had to raise his eyebrow at her before Addison continued. ‘The smell of alcohol makes me sick.’

‘I appreciate the shifts you have done to help out while Harley has been away, but if you want to continue at the bakery then you have to start at the bottom and work your way up, just like Harley did,’ my sister was told sternly.

‘But…’ Addison said. She would always want the easy way out.

‘Addison,’ Grandpa warned, ‘tread carefully with your next words. I may not work at the bakery anymore, but I still have a say in the business.’

‘Start at the bottom, but that’s not fair, Grandpa.’ Addison looked her grandfather in the eye and scoffed at him. ‘I know how to manage a business. I’ve been doing it for two years now at the bar I work at, so I should at least be able to start with managing the three shops the bakery has.’

‘Managing the shops?’ Grandpa replied with his own scoff, and I wanted to laugh myself, but I didn’t. I kept my laughter and my thoughts to myself. ‘You may have experience managing bars, but Addison, do you even know how to bake? Anything?’

I was interested in what my sister had to say, but she didn’t say anything, she just shook her head.

‘Then you start at the bottom. If you want to manage the James Family Bakery then you have to learn how to bake,’ Grandpa told Addison firmly.

I could see she wanted to object, and I wasn’t the only one who could see the change in my sister’s body language, because Grandpa then said, ‘My word is final. And Harley.’ He turned his attention back to me. ‘What happened?’

I knew Grandpa wanted to know where I had been and why I hadn’t been at work, but to tell him that I had to drag Addison’s dare into it and all of my other shit too.

I couldn’t contain the mess just to me anymore. It was about to become everyone’s mess.

‘I just couldn’t do it anymore,’ I began. ‘The hours I put in at the bakery, the factory, and then the paperwork on top of that, it’s all too much. When you retired five years ago, Grandpa, the work kept me busy and stopped me from hitting rock bottom, but my insomnia isn’t the same now as it was back then. I’m tired. The bakery has been growing since I took over and it’s too much for one person to manage by themselves.’

I watched as my mother narrowed her gaze on me. Surprise filled her facial features before it disappeared a moment later. Zach squeezed my hip for comfort. I guess my mother didn’t know about the insomnia. Well, she did now, but I couldn’t stop to explain it to her.

‘You always said Addison and I would do this together, work alongside each other, but I didn’t think it would take this long for Addison to come on board. It’s great that she is, but after all the hours I’ve put in, I’m burnt out.’ Relief washed over me now that what I needed to say was out in the open.

‘It will be easier now Addison is on board,’ Grandpa explained. ‘You can start to cut back your hours.’

‘But for how long? Until Addison gets sick from the smell of the bakery and finds somewhere else to work. Then what happens?’ I knew I had hit a nerve and maybe it wasn’t fair, but life wasn’t fair. It was about time this family dealt with the elephant in the room.

‘Harley, you bitch.’ It was loud enough that everyone could hear it.

‘Addison, I know you thought this would play out differently, but you need to fess up to what you have done,’ I said to my sister, even after what she’d just called me.

‘Fess up to what, Harley. What does Addison need to fess up to?’ Grandpa stared between the two of us with his eyebrows drawn in.

‘You need to tell them. They will find out sooner or later.’ I met my sister’s eyes straight on. Her eyes were green just like mine. She was pissed and so was I, but she had started this mess. I just wanted it to work in my favour. I wanted out.

Maybe she needed to fess up about the dare she put on me, but she definitely needed to tell our family about her pregnancy. She wouldn’t be able to raise a child on her own, and she would need our help. Addison had always been the wild one of the family, so her news shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone. It didn’t to me when Addison had shared her news right before she had dared me. I remember the night four weeks ago when I’d found her waiting on the veranda of my house. She’d blurted out, ‘I’m pregnant,’ and after I’d congratulated her, Addison had proceeded to lay out her dare for me to sing in a public setting or hand over this house and operations of the bakery to her.

I knew Addison’s pregnancy was the real reason she wanted what I had. So, I did the one thing that she wouldn’t be able to back down from. It was my turn, although the stakes weren’t as high as Addison’s, but then again, maybe they were higher.

‘I dare you, and if you don’t, I will.’ My eyes stayed locked on my sister’s.

‘Oh my God. Enough with the dares! You two are neither children nor teenagers, you’re both adults.’ It was the first time our mother had spoken, and she had our attention now. ‘I don’t know when these dares escalated, but they need to stop. These dares have clearly torn you two apart. They were always meant to be a bit of harmless fun between the two of you, to stop you from getting bored. They were meant to be a way for you two to always stick together and have each other’s backs. Now look at the both of you. You look like you want to kill each other.’

Just when I thought my mother had finished, she said, ‘Tell us about the dare, Addison. What did you do?’

Addison didn’t say anything, not at first. My sister and I were both staring at our mother, and it was quite possible we had both come to the same conclusion. When did our mother re-join humanity instead of being the recluse she had become?

‘Mum?’ Addison said.

‘Don’t Mum me, Addison.’ Our mother said. ‘I may have not been present in the years after your father’s death, and I’m sorry. I was depressed for long time and getting out of bed most days was impossible. But you two had always been good girls, and thank you, Robert and Johanna, for all that you have done when I couldn’t.’

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