Page 82 of Wrong Pucking Jersey

Maddox lowers the box on his left side, but its importance is dismissed as he stands in front of us. I go still when his hands are suddenly pressed onto my shoulders, using me as the support he needs while only inches from Mishka’s face.

“Baby girl.” Goosebumps ignite along my arms. “Breathe for us.”

For us…

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

I don’t dare move an inch as the intensity palpitating in the air between us makes it feel like it’s hard to breathe. I’m holding my breath, focusing on Mishka, who lifts her gaze enough to see Maddox in her line of vision.

She inhales and exhales, slowing those drills even further just by staring into Maddox’s eyes.

Anyone on the outside would look at us like we’ve lost our minds, but we know better.

Why are we doing this?

With any type of fall that triggered a reaction in Mishka, we do exactly that—encourage her to breathe, and ensure she’s okay, not on the verge of a panic attack.

This is the best tactic to ensure our girl is okay and that she doesn’t spiral into the past.

“Breathing,” she finally states, even though she sounds breathless.

I tighten my grip on her while pressing my chest forward so she can feel the safety my hold can deliver her.

“You’re sitting right on my lap, Mishka,” I remind her while my lips slightly touch the side of her neck as I whisper. “In your new living space. Nothing more.”

She takes a few more breaths and slowly bobs her head.

“You’re right.” She’s slowly snapping out of whatever is playing in her mind.

Mikayla almost died once.

We were all there.

Family and friends, celebrating Coach Johnson and the Toronto Maple Leafs making it to the finals to win the Stanley Cup. Skating on the ice, we joked and laughed, then something happened. An argument broke out. Jayce was involved, and there goes Mikayla’s mother, hoping to intervene.

Then the ice cracked.

Everything happened so fast, but by the time many of us registered what was happening, Mikayla’s mother was in the depths of the frigid water.

To this day, I’m pretty thankful for Maddox’s speed.

How he reacts and doesn’t think twice about it.

He would have been an amazing firefighter.

The shock of everything made Mishka have a full-blown panic attack before she tried to get on the ice that was further cracking. When she fell in, we were already in action and close enough to pull her right out, but the sensation stuck with her.

Haunts her whenever she falls.

Everyone survived that night and would make a full recovery, but that moment changed the Johnson family before they realized it.

A few days later, they found out Mishka’s mother had cancer.

“I’m okay.” I finally hear her say, but when I’m giving her my attention, my whole body goes still because Maddox kisses her that very second.

While she’s still in my lap.

His hands gripping my shoulders.

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