Page 23 of Into the Woods

Shit. I was probably worse. Even Linc, my best damn friend with whom I shared everything from cars to women, had been giving me a wide berth lately. And after the stunt with Cori? He’d flat out told me to get my shit together or he’d hold my arms as Ryan and Royal took turns kicking my ass.

With a huff, Rook fell back deeper into his seat, flicking a hand at me. “Fine, I’ll tell you what happened with Emerson if you tell me what happened with Bex.”

My teeth clicked audibly as I ground them together.

Rook arched dark brows, his expression mocking. “Not so chatty now, little brother?”

I watched him for a weighted beat. “What do you want to know?”

He looked stunned, probably because I’d shut down anything and everything that had to do with Rebecca Whittier over the past few weeks. Speaking her name was like invoking a specter I was desperately trying to put to rest.

Except the past few days of sober clarity had made me realize one important thing: that girl was embedded in the very fibers of my soul. When God had made me, he’d given me everything except a heart. That piece of my anatomy had been born three years and six months later in the form of my mom’s best friend’s daughter.

I could still remember the first time I’d met her. I’d been three and, like most humans, I didn’t have a lot of solid recollections from that time in my life. But meeting her? Yeah, that shit was seared into my mind’s eye for eternity.

A psychologist would probably spout some bullshit for why it was such a strong memory—maybe some chemical reaction to the lighting and smells of the room that day—but all I knew was that the first time I saw her, I spoke a word I’d never uttered before.

Mine.

My mom and Bex’s mother had looked at me and cracked up, assuming the mine I was referring to was the tiny toy truck I’d dropped into her bassinet as I’d leaned over to get a look at her face, but it wasn’t that.

She was mine, and on some primal level, my brain had recognized that.

It was the only shit that made sense, especially as we grew up. I was almost four years older than her. Sure, our moms were friends, but there was no clear reason that the draw I felt to her was so strong. Strong enough that Linc and Ryan used to tease me about it, until I’d bloodied Ryan’s nose and busted Linc’s lip. After that, they hadn’t questioned it when I always tried to include her.

We’d grown up in the same neighborhood. It was a gated community of mansions and rolling hills, but it also had its own parks and playgrounds. We’d all had nannies, and they’d brought us to the same place to play. Some of my earliest and best memories were made with my friends and Bex.

Cutting her out of my life for almost eight years had been brutal. And having had a taste of her back in my life only to have her ripped away by my own idiocy was killing me.

I shook my head, eyeing Rook. “Take it from me, brother, don’t blow it. If there’s something between you and…”

He grimaced. “Emerson.”

“Right,” I murmured, “Emerson. Don’t throw it away because you’re scared or think it’s what’s best for her.”

“I slept with her,” he finally admitted.

My brow raised. “And? What? It sucked?”

He grimaced, looking down. “Best night of my fucking life, Court. It was like all the pieces of the puzzle came together.”

“So, what went wrong?” I asked.

“Timing,” he replied with a shrug. “She’s got a daughter—”

“And you don’t want kids?”

He shut that shit down fast. “Honestly? I never saw myself with kids. Wasn’t something I wanted. I mean, what kind of fucking role model do I have to look up to? Jasper?” He looked disgusted, but the expression quickly smoothed away as he added, “But Elodie… Fuck, I love that kid, man. I can’t even explain it.”

“What went wrong?”

He huffed, scrubbing a hand down his face. “Everything. Em and I had this… amazing night. We’d been dancing around each other for weeks. Months. But she’s the widow of one of my closest friends. Crossing that line… Fuck, man. It was a big step.”

“I get that,” I agreed, nodding.

“When Royal asked me to come with him to talk to Ford about joining Phoenix, I knew I’d see her, but I didn’t expect to realize…” He shook his head, lips pressed into a hard line. “I didn’t expect to feel like, when I walked into her house and saw her smiling and Elodie crawling to me, I was home.”

“Yeah, I’m not seeing the problem here,” I told him with a low laugh.

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