Page 16 of Prodigal Son

“Your mate?”

His gaze cast downward and shame overtook his voice. “Not my mate, but Abilene, my wife. After months of neglecting her needs, I brutally attacked her.”

“You were feeish, under this dark spell?”

“Nevertheless.”

“Pagans believe in a shadow-self, a dark part of the soul where secrets and shame grow. That’s why shadow work is so important. It nurtures the balance within, assuring we are no more darkness than light, no more evil than good. Even in yin, there must exist a spot of yang to maintain this balance. One cannot exist without the other. If you seek to absolve all darkness inside your soul, I’m afraid that’s impossible.”

“I only wish to be normal again.”

“Ah, but you were never normal.”

Juniper’s breath held as she waited for his response. Mabel might play along with these kooks, but she didn’t go easy on them. It was a skill.

“When immortals ignore God’s call, evil takes hold, erasing the good until there is nothing left,” Jonas finally muttered, His voice heavy with shame.

“Are you suggesting you waited too long?”

“I waited longer than I should have, but acted soon enough. However, I don’t think I stopped the process. I’m afraid I’ve only slowed it.”

“Can that happen? Has anyone else of your kind gone through something similar?”

“Not that I know of, and I’m fearful to ask. If I become a danger to others, our laws require my death.”

“Do you feel dangerous?”

“I feel evil creeping inside of me. There’s an ache in my bones, a brittleness that rattles my lungs, as if my insides have been loosened by time.”

“Aging.”

“Dying,” he corrected. “It’s pushing out the good, stealing away my life. My soul. What happens when there is nothing left of me? What will become of my body? Who will take care of my wife?”

“Existence is a give and take, Jonas. A balance. Joy cannot exist without pain. Good cannot exist without evil. We arrogantly label something evil when it no longer feels like it’s serving us, but what if this is exactly as you were designed to be?”

“I am not evil.”

“No living creature is completely good. We are all capable of evil when survival is on the line. Faith, true faith, requires surrender and trust. Relinquish control and let the Goddess work. Nature is self-healing, self-correcting. If She wants to save you, She will make it so.”

“I’m immortal. Our kind is not meant to die.”

“But half of your soul is gone. It died with your mate, Clara.” Despite Jonas’s rising frustration, Aunt Bel remained composed and kept her voice calm.

“There has to be a reason why I’m still living even though she is not.”

“Are you living or are you stuck in the In-Between? We all exist in Mother Earth’s cycle, though some of our cycles last longer than others. But in the end, we all come full circle. Ashes to ashes. Death is but a new beginning.”

“Immortals do not die.”

“Don’t they?”

He held his words for a long pause. “We can be killed, but it’s difficult.”

“Even gods die. There’s no shame in it. You think you’re somehow entitled to eternity, but your arrogance has misled you. The Goddess gives life and takes life. That is how She maintains balance. You surrendered half of your soul when your mate passed on.”

“But I’m still here.”

“For now. If I cut down a tree, the roots will eventually die. If there is a rot at the roots, the tree will wither away. Decomposing might take thousands of years, but every living thing will eventually die. It’s just a matter of time and circumstance. Half of you is already gone.”

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