Page 69 of Knot That Serious

“Sorry,” he said, “habit,” and promptly disappeared to the other bathroom.

Eli cleared her throat, cheeks bright pink. “So… what’s for—”

“How are you feeling—”

They spoke at the same time, both of their questions trailing off into silence.

For the first time in their life, they stared awkwardly at one another, unsure what to say.

Jack hated it.

But he was frozen silent, confused by the force of his feelings, choking on them.

“Fine,” Eli answered. “Just tired. Hungry,” she said, gaze flicking to the stove again. Jack picked up the spatula and stirred the food, releasing fresh steam and the scent of eggs and bacon. There was cinnamon toast, too, because Eli always preferred sweets, anyway.

When Jack turned back to her to gauge her expression, she was scooting the vase of wilted flowers over.

“I’ll get new ones,” he promised. “Didn’t really have time before…”

Before her heat hit. Before they’d spent the better part of an entire week wrapped in one another’s arms.

Jack knew more about Eli now, after the duration of her heat, than he’d learned in their twenty years of friendship. And yet it suddenly felt like there was a canyon between them.

“I’m gonna… go get my phone. See if we missed anything from the bakery,” she said slowly. “But I’ll be back for food.”

Jack sighed as she disappeared. Why was this awkward? What had happened to things staying the same?

He frowned down at the pan, stirring it mindlessly, and that’s how Beckett found him. Then Eli, when she returned just in time for Jack to separate their servings onto plates.

Beckett was fresh out of the shower, his scent clean and green like usual. Jack watched Eli’s gaze flit to him more often than not, and he wished he could read her mind.

Was she looking forward to cuddling on the couch? Her day with him tomorrow?

Fuck, what if Beckett was right? If Eli could grow attached to Beckett and face her feelings for him, couldn’t she do the same for Jack?

What if it could all work out?

Jack hated going in circles like this.

“What movie do you wanna watch tonight?” Beckett asked, bringing them all back to the present.

Eli glanced up from her plate, where she was pushing her food around a bit, eating only a few bites. Jack narrowed his gaze.

“Actually…” Eli began, then paused and seemed to reconsider before she finally said, “I think I want some time alone. To refresh the nest, you know?”

Beckett was really good at hiding his disappointment. Jack kept his face turned down to his plate so she wouldn’t see his.

“Only if you’re sure,” Beckett said.

“Yep,” Eli said. “Just because I went through a heat, doesn’t mean I’m less me. And I enjoy my alone time.”

Jack’s lips twitched at that. Eli, despite having a huge, loving family and Jack to lean on, preferred to rely on no one but herself. Usually, Jack appreciated that.

But right then he had to smother his alpha instincts to make sure her nest included his scent. To make sure she didn’t erase him.

Because… fuck.

Jack wanted to be her fucking alpha.

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