Page 84 of The Silence Lies

He nods before we both let the silence blanket us. This is one of the few times I enjoy his quiet persona, never asking questions or prying too far. When it comes to recent events, I’m glad to be surrounded by Giovanni’s silence and not Luca and Levi’s disgruntled scoffs.

We sip our coffee in silence, never lulling into any kind of awkwardness. It’s nice to be able to think while in the company of someone else, never having to answer questions. Today of all days, I’m just not ready for them. I’m still trying to figure out what to do about Levi and Luca.

I can’t choose between them; it’s just not an option. My feelings for Luca grew tenfold in the space of such a short time that I don’t even know when it happened. Levi has always been there and it wasn’t until that moment we shared in my office weeks ago that I realized I liked him more than just my second-in-command. Everything is so confusing right now that being alone with my thoughts is a welcomed reprieve I’m thankful for.

Warmth covers my hand, snapping me out of my daze. I glance down to see Giovanni’s hand resting atop mine, an unusual but familiar gesture he has made a few times before. When I look up, the depths of his green eyes are brimmed with curiosity. Giovanni’s gaze softens, his touch on my hand contradicting. Sometimes I wish he would just say something, anything to break up the silence and reassure me. Whatever the reason is for his vow of silence, I respect it. I also respect the willpower he holds because it can’t be easy holding back on wanting to speak out.

“I’m okay,” I reassure. “I’m just thinking things over.”

He tilts his head, a sigh flaring his nostrils.

From the way he looks at me, I’m hazarding a guess he wants me to talk.

“I worry about them, you know?” I admit. “I worry about all of you. I know danger comes with this position, but if anything happened to any of you…” I heave a sigh, a hiccup of air hanging in my chest. “I don’t think I could live with myself.”

Giovanni gives my hand a squeeze, and that reassuring comfort he manages to ease me into effortlessly swallows me up. It’s so easy to be around him. I wouldn’t go as far as to say it’s the silence, but more that his actions feel so much more genuine than words ever could.

I gaze up at him, a hopeless expectation lingering between us. For a moment, I wonder just how much I would care if something happened to Giovanni. I don’t know anything about him, but he’s certainly proved how reliable he is. His loyalty goes without question, and despite the vow of silence, I feel like I know him better this way.

It’s the little things that I notice the most about my bodyguard. The subtle way his nostrils flare when he’s angry; I swear Giovanni almost had an aneurysm from Levi and Luca’s showdown in the courtyard. The green in his eyes seems brighter when he’s trying not to smile—and yes, there have been one or two occasions where I’ve seen a gentle smile grace those lips.

I find myself staring for too long, relishing the soft touch of his hand on mine. There are so many things I wish I could know about my bodyguard. If it weren’t for the silence, I’m not sure I would be so intrigued. Then again, Giovanni captivated me from the moment he stepped into my office.

“They’re going to be fine.”

Giovanni snatches his hand away, a chill eating up the place where his palm once was.

Slowly, I turn to see Raf standing in the doorway. He clears his throat, suddenly aware of the tension in the room. His eyes dart between us until I glare at him, silently imploring him to say whatever he came to say.

“I won’t let anything happen to them. I promise.”

I cast a glance over my shoulder at Giovanni, but he’s already pushing up off his stool and moving towards the sink.

With a huff, I look back at Raf. “Maybe you should get back to it then, instead of standing here trying to convince me.”

He waves a phone in the air, the moving image of the convoy heading towards the valley on the screen. “Figured you could use some company.”

“Gio was doing fine without you,” I snap. I know I’m being hard on the guy, but I can’t seem to stop it or find it in me to care. The asshole pretty much watched me endure Luciano and his tyrannical love for months and did nothing. Even when he caught me trying to leave one night to meet Enzo, he didn’t try to help me. Instead, he called Luciano and I was snatched away before I could do anything.

Memories like those stick with people like me. Abuse, negligence, ignorance. None of that diminishes, no matter how many years have passed. No matter how much growing up we’ve all done, I will always remember those helpless moments. They might have shaped me into the woman I am today, but that’s through no influence from Raf.

“Sera,” he sighs, perching on the stool that Giovanni just vacated.

I turn my head, but my silent bodyguard is nowhere to be seen. Great.

“I meant what I said. I won’t let anything happen to them. You have my word.”

Glaring at Raf, I meet his stubborn gaze. I sip my coffee, using the time to evaluate and consider my next words. “I’m sure you can understand why your word means very little to me. The only reason you are here is because of Luca. If it were my choice…” I lean forward, making sure he understands the wrath I conceal beneath the surface. “I’d have thrown you to the Vultures already.”

“And I’d respect you for that.”

His response throws me off. I’m surprised by Raf’s discernment. I expect him to toss some nonchalant comment my way or shrug me off. Instead, empathy shines in his eyes.

“I can’t ever forgive myself for what I did to you, Bianchi. I don’t expect you to do something I can’t. But I can prove my loyalty to you.”

“Like you did with the Verdis?” I snipe.

“Cazzo!” He slams his fist on the kitchen island. “I was young, Sera! I didn’t know any fucking better! You of all people know the power that family has over people. I was sucked in, goddamnit!”

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