Apart from hopefully having sex? I clear my throat. “I thought I might go to the cinema and treat myself to a meal out.”
 
 “Oh, okay. Have a lovely time, sweetheart. Enjoy yourself. You deserve it.”
 
 I stare at the screen as a notification pops up.Mark sent you a new message. Oh, holy shit.
 
 “Take care, and you know where I am,” I tell her.
 
 She waves. “Speak soon!” And she ends the call.
 
 I tap the notification. It opens in the Tinder app, and there it is. A message from Mark.
 
 Mark:Hi
 
 Okay, so not a lot to go on. He couldn’t even be bothered to use any punctuation. Kids today…
 
 My heart in my mouth, I reply with:Hello!
 
 Mark:Sup
 
 Me:Not much! I’ve been hanging out with my sister. She’s at Vic. What are you up to?
 
 Mark:Work
 
 Me:I see you’re a dentist!
 
 Mark:Assistant yeah
 
 Me:That must be interesting?
 
 Mark:It’s okay
 
 Me:You play WoW, right?
 
 Mark:Yeah
 
 Me:What class do you play?
 
 Mark:Troll warrior
 
 Me:Ooh, Horde? The enemy, LOL. I play a human paladin healer.
 
 Mark:Okay
 
 Jesus, this guy’s hard work.
 
 Me:You have a dog in one of your photos. Is it yours?
 
 Mark:No
 
 Fuck me. I decide to take the bull by somewhere even more aggressive than his horns.
 
 Me:Look, I’m new to Tinder. Do you normally chat for a while? Or would you prefer to meet up?
 
 I wait for him to reply.
 
 Ten minutes goes by.
 
 I know he’s at work, so maybe he’s in the middle of an appointment or something? While I wait, I ring room service and ask for a latte to be sent up with a piece of chocolate cheesecake. Then I watch half an hour of a ridiculous game show on the TV.