Page 86 of Merciless Sinner

"Okay.”

“I'm going to clean up the kitchen. You can get ready ahead of me."

I was about to agree again, but I stop myself.

"Something bad happened, didn't it, Virgo?" My voice reflects the impatience I feel. "I wish you would tell me. I don't want to be kept in the dark. I've lived there for the last two and a half years."

Hesitation mixes with sympathy as he stares back at me. I can read conflict swirling in his eyes.

For a moment, he looks like he might tell me what's going on, but then his face hardens, and he becomes the mafia boss again.

"There's nothing to worry about," he assures me.

"But I can see there is. Virgo, you’ve told me nothing about what’s going on.”

"Look, we need to think about what Dr. Belmont said. No stress, remember?"

“Not knowing is stressing me out.”

“I know, but that stress will never be as much as knowing every single detail. There's nothing to tell you right now that's going to be helpful. Please just trust me.”

This is awful, but I have to acknowledge that he might be right.

"Okay.”

He moves closer and plants a kiss on my forehead. “I promise I will update you as soon as we have something solid. Just give me time.”

“Alright. You know it’s going to come to a point where you’re going to have to tell me something.”

“I know, but that’s not tonight. Let’s get to bed.”

We do, but I don’t sleep.

Neither does he.

After we make love, we lie next to each other for hours.

My back is pressed against his chest, and he holds me until he thinks I'm sleeping.

He then gets up and walks over to the window to light up a cigar. There he smokes for a while. I've never seen him smoke like that before. He's done it occasionally when I’ve been around, but never for this long. I also sense he can tell I’m not asleep.

It’s a while before he comes back to bed. He lies next to me, slipping his arm around me, pulling me within the safety of his chest.

I roll into his arms, showing I'm awake, but I rest my head on his chest and listen to the slow, steady rhythm of his heart. The sound lulls me to sleep and right into that dream where the darkness lives.

Suddenly, I'm in that hole again, that hole of nothingness. Everything is so dark. I can't even see my hands. I feel my way through dirt and hard surfaces, but it feels like someone is following me. I move faster, faster, hoping the voice will come and save me. Footsteps behind me now, and I start running. I run as fast as I can, stumbling and falling. I don't know how I get up with my legs shaking so much, but I do. I run faster, and then I see the hand and hear the voice.

"Come to me," it says, but this is the first time I can hear that the voice belongs to a boy. I run faster, the footsteps galloping behind me now like a crowd of horses. The hand I'm looking for reaches down, and I see the light.

"Come to me, Zayka."

Within the light, a face appears, and I notice straight away that it's Virgo, but he doesn't look like he looks now. He doesn't sound as he does now either. His voice is that of a boy’s.

"Olivia!" he calls out. "Come to me. Take my hand." I take his hand, and as I'm pulled up out of the dream, I land straight in Virgo's arms, but this Virgo is right in front of me, not in my head and not a boy. He's back to being a man again.

Looking panicked, he switches on the light, and I see I'm not in that hole anymore. I'm next to him in the bed.

"Olivia, are you okay?"