“What? No snarky comments about my girlie underthings?”

“Baby, no jokes can be made about panties and bras like those,” I said as I actively tried not to picture her wearing them.

I failed.

And when she looked up, I could see in her eyes that she knew exactly what I was thinking.

“Stop picturing me without my clothes on.”

“That’s kind of rich coming from someone who was checking me out without my shirt on this morning.”

“Oh, get over yourself. I was not,” she said, small-eyeing me.

“You absolutely were,” I countered, lowering my voice as I leaned slightly closer, enjoying watching the way she swallowed hard.

“Please,” she said, rolling her eyes, but her voice was just a touch more breathless than it had been before. “Someone looking in your general direction doesn’t mean they are checking you out.”

“No,” I agreed, leaning over her. “But you were.”

“I locked up all the windows,” Aurelio said, coming up behind me, prompting Traveler to jump backward with her hands full of lacy and silky bras and panties.

“What’s this?” Aurelio asked, sensing the tension in the room but misinterpreting it. “He teasing you about your underwear?” he asked, shaking his head. “Like a fucking child,” he added with a pointed look in my direction.

“I’m gonna go dump your perishables,” I said.

“No!” Traveler snapped, making me pause mid-stride.

“Why not? You want it to go rancid in your fridge while you’re away?”

“No, but I don’t want to waste perfectly good food either. We can bring it to the hotel. There’s a full-sized fridge.”

I may or may not have mumbled something about her being acrazy hippie chickunder my breath as I started away.

“What was that?” she barked.

“I saidWhatever you want, honey bun,” I lied, turning back to find her slitting her eyes at the pet name. “Snookums?” I asked, getting a grumble out of her. “Sugar tits?” I asked, and this time, she picked up a book from her nightstand and hurled it at me, whacking me on the side of the head. “Hey, that wasn’t verypeace and loveof you,” I said, handing the book to Aurelio whose brows raised at what was obviously an abstract pussy on the cover and a title that included the wordComeon it.

He placed the book down before following me out.

“What?” I asked.

“Am I going to be babysitting the fucking two of you this whole trip?” he asked, grabbing one of Traveler’s many reusable bags that were hanging from a hook behind her back door.

“Probably,” I said, pulling out almond milk, eggs in a carton that was hand stamped with a label claiming they came from ‘happy free range hens,’ some veggies, and several almond-based yogurts into bags.

She didn’t keep much in her fridge, actually. Probably because she spent most of her time at work.

“You know what the two of you are like?” Aurelio asked as he grabbed the bananas, pears, and apples out of a bowl on the counter and put those in another bag.

“What?” I asked, having a feeling I wasn’t going to like his answer.

“Like two grade school kids with a crush. But to cover it up, they tease each other and put gum in one another’s hair.”

“It’s not like that,” I insisted as I heard Traveler zipping her suitcase in the other room.

“Yeah, sure it’s not,” Aurelio said, shaking his head as he took the bags of food, and made his way toward the front door.

Traveler moved out of her room then, glowering at me, but not saying a word as she moved toward the front of the house.