Page 36 of Dark Seduction

“It’s been almost a week,” I remark. “Maybe we should go check on her.” I walk over to my bike, but V reaches out, and grasps me on the arm.

“You can’t leave your own patch party.”

“Watch me,” I hiss.

“Dude, think about it. If you walk out on this party, it’ll make you look ungrateful for this opportunity. Stay.”

I hesitate. V is right. If I leave, it’ll make me look like I don’t appreciate all that my brothers have done for me. But I can’t walk away from Mack either. Something is wrong. I know it is.

“What if I have someone else go check on her?” I suggest.

“Do you hear yourself right now? You sound like a frantic old woman. She’s sick, asshole. I’m sure if she needed something, she would have reached out by now. She’s probably asleep.”

V’s words tug at my heartstrings. He’s probably right. She probably just needs some rest, but it doesn’t lessen the sting of her absence.

I snarl in anger. “I want her here with us.” The furious rage inside boils up and overflows my mouth in a torrent of sound. “Aren’t you tired of sneaking around with her? I know I am. I want the club to know. I don’t want to keep us in the shadows.”

“Do you hear yourself right now?” V counters. “We all know how she feels going public with us. Maybe she’s just not ready to see you all decked out in your new colors,” he says, his voice low. “Give her some space. I’m sure she’s not trying to ghost on you. She may not even know how much of a big deal tonight is for you.”

I narrow my eyes at him, feeling my anger rise. “What are you implying, V?” I growl, taking a step towards him. He raises his hands in surrender, shaking his head. “I tried to tell her how important tonight is. I texted her. I left her voicemails. All fucking unanswered.”

“Nothing, man. I’m just saying maybe she needs some time to process everything, you know? She calls the shots, remember? That’s what we agreed to go forward with this. One party, and you’re trying to break her fucking rules. “

“I’m tired of feeling ashamed for wanting to love her.”

V pauses. We hadn’t brought up the l word yet as a group, but my feelings had been there from the beginning. I’m falling hard for Mack.

“You can’t force someone to feel the same way,” he replies finally. “Whatever’s going on with Mack, she can handle it, and she’ll come to you when she’s ready.”

I take a deep breath, trying to calm down. V’s words make sense, but I can’t help feeling hurt that Mack isn’t here to share in this moment. The biggest moment for me and the club. I wanted to share that with her.

“You’re right,” I say finally. “I should give her some time.”

V nods, clapping a hand on my shoulder. “I know it’s tough, man. But you can’t force her to like this life the same way we do. She’s going to have to find her own way. If it s, she’ll be here.”

I take a deep breath and nod, letting his words sink in. He’s right. If it s, Mack will eventually come around. Until then, I can only respect her space.

“Let me give it a couple more hours. If we don’t hear from her, you’ll try to check on her?” I ask, my voice resigned.

“Yes, if that will get your fucking ass back into your party, I will go check on her.”

“I don’t know why, but I can’t shake this feeling that she’s not okay. I know all of this is still new. She’s never gone this long without contacting me.”

“She’s fine, Burnt. Trust me. She’d tell us if she wasn’t. When I left the garage earlier, her car was in the garage and her apartment light was on. She’s safe in her apartment.”

“How do you know that?”

“Listen, you want to go check on her? That’s fine. But do it after the party. Stay, enjoy these moments with your brothers. They put in the work for you, show them you appreciate it.”

The words of wisdom hit me square in the chest. Maybe V is right. We all have our moments of weakness, but I can’t let them define me. I take a deep breath and turn back towards the clubhouse, ready to enjoy my hard earned patch party.

The music and energy of my brothers and their families welcomes me, and for a moment, I forget my worries. I see a few of the brothers eyeing me and the newly sewn patches on my leather cut with admiration, and a swell of pride washes over me. I may not have Mack here with me, but I’m still surrounded by people who care for and accept me.

No matter what, I am a part of something much bigger now. And I am not alone, but the wound that she’s not here will be a painful reminder that not all of my family is by my side tonight.

The party rages on until the wee hours of the morning. Most of the guys have trickled away to their rooms here or gone home with their old ladies, leaving just a few of us still here.

I head back outside, spying V sitting in one of the outdoor loungers by the fire pit out back. I plop into one of the open ones next to him. “About earlier.”