Page 33 of Home Tears

“I traveled, Aunt Mae. The whole point of me leaving was not to get in touch with anyone back here.”

Aunt Mae sat silent, then harrumphed, “Well, that’s all done. You’re here. You’re staying, and it’s time you got one.” She patted her leg.

“You think so, huh?”

“I sure damn do—stop with the bait and hook game. I’m too irritated to bite the bait.”

Her word was final, set in stone, and passed by legislation.

Dani chuckled silently to herself. “I love you, Aunt Mae.”

“I love you, too.”

“And I’ll go get a cellphone tomorrow.” Dani waited and added, “Right after I steal my mother’s picture.”

She didn’t have to wait long. It only took a second before Aunt Mae sputtered and exclaimed, “You’re doing what? From where?” She frowned. “I’m surprised any still exist. Kathryn was always a bit irrational, and she could be mean. I thought she would’ve tossed everything out.”

Dani held her breath, remembering Mrs. Bendsfield’s proclamations. “Why was Aunt Kathryn so irrational? Was your mother like that?”

“Oh.” Aunt Mae’s frown deepened, and she plucked at the blanket on her lap. “I suppose. Your mother and Kathryn never wanted to talk about your grandmother, but I got enough black sheep in me to handle it. No. My mother had all these ideas and grand schemes in life. She’d either be on top of the world or she’d be thinking the world was on top of her. No, no. Your grandma wasn’t alright in the head at times. I’d like to think Kathryn got more than her fair share of our mother.”

“What part did my mom get?”

“She got the dreamer. Kathryn got the scheming part, some of her paranoia, too.”

“And you?”

“Oh.” A smile warmed her face. “I got the wild streak. But I got some of her demons. Too much boozing, too much whoring, and too many life lessons learned the hard way. That was me—yep—up until the day your mother asked me to take care of you.”

Dani caught her breath.

“I stopped living your grandmother’s dreams, thinking they were mine, and I turned serious. I think she knew you wouldn’t take to Kathryn.”

“Aunt Kathryn didn’t take to me.”

“No, no. That wasn’t it.” Aunt Mae’s voice was firm. “I’m betting your mother knew Kathryn wouldn’t mold you, so she came to me. That’s back when she found out she was going to go, and Kathryn wasn’t accepting it, you see. I think Kathryn lived in denial of your mother’s sickness.”

“Why didn’t you guys ever talk about Grandma?”

“Oh,” Aunt Mae sighed softly. “It was more about what she didn’t do than what she did do. I lived through it, but I was the first out of the home, so I guess I didn’t see the worst to come. I heard about it, and I always thought Kathryn and your mother got a little brainwashed against me. Your grandmother and I used to fight. Those was ugly fights. Nasty.”

“You said it was about what she didn’t do?”

“She didn’t love us. Not the way it’s supposed to be, you know. She put herself first. I think a part of us all came from your grandmother, but I’d like to think I partied my selfish streak out of me. I knew enough to know when my little sister Danny came to me that meant my universe shifted. I needed to change, and she informed me of that. She said she would not have my lifestyle influencing her children, and I needed to straighten up if I wanted to be a part of your life.”

Another memory tinged with a bitter lining. Dani remembered standing at her mother’s funeral, staring at that casket in the ground. Julia and Erica were huddled against Aunt Kathryn’s sides with her arms holding both, all three with tears on their faces. Dani stood alone. She’d yet to throw her pink rose inside, but she bit her lip to keep from crying.

Then Mae was there, and she nudged her hand with her own.

“You held my hand at the funeral.”

A hoarse chuckle ripped from Aunt Mae’s throat. “I’d been standing in the back, all self-conscious and not knowing what the hell I was supposed to do. Your mother only spared one conversation with me in years, but you looked so lost and lonely. A little puppy that just realized her mother wasn’t coming back for her.”

“You picked me up, and Aunt Kathryn thought it was the most horrible thing that could’ve happened. I remember that.”

“Ah—Kathryn has some of our mother’s jealousy, too. She was clueless, didn’t know how to even speak with you, but she couldn’t stand the thought that I might know. You and me, Dani, we speak the same language. Your two sisters, they speak Kathryn’s language. Your mother knew that.”

Her mother had known her. Her mother had looked out for her. Dani blinked her own tears back, holding tighter onto the blanket.

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