Page 20 of The Jester and His Outlaw: Part 2

She had a few errands to run while I slept and insisted she come over.

“Fine, the guys are checking on Riggs, and I wanted to check on you.”

“The guys went to check on him?” She winces, so I pry. “Did he do something which made them feel the need? He will not be happy they are checking up on him.”

“Well, he’s going to have to get over it. Jensen loves the kid to death, whether or not he likes it. He’s been texting him, but he said Riggs is being short with him, that’s all. They went to take him some food to make sure he’s eaten today,” she explains and I groan, hating imagining him in such a terrible state. It makes my heart hurt. I’ve wanted to call him so many times today, because let’s be honest, I sure as hell didn’t sleep any. Instead, I laid awake planning what I was going to do.

Is it time to walk away from him? I don’t know if I want to, and even if I did, I don’t fucking think if I can bear it. The boy has my heart. He puts it through the blender. No, not true.Iput it through the blender. He’s been honest from the beginning, telling me to stay away.

Ugh.

“What am I going to do, Fox?” She shrugs with her lips, her eyes sympathetic. I have half a brain to think all this has got to be very annoying to her. Both of her guys are stable. A terrible thing to say about Riggs, but true. She has to put up with them rescuing him all the time.

The scariest part of all this is knowing he is fine with ending his life at any moment. I can’t stand to think of it. I simply want him to be happy, to have everything he deserves in life. It’s not fair that someone so sweet and caring has been dealt such a shitty hand.

“I’m only going to say this once, and you know me, I mean it. I’ve been team Riggs from the beginning, girl. If you want to be with him, go be with him. He’s troubled, so what. Aren’t we all? Some struggle. Do I worry about your heart and sanity a little? Yes, but I have to believe he will get better. Eventually, he will let you in, you keep fighting.”

“But when do I give up?”

“I can’t answer for you. You go with what your heart tells you.” She takes a bite of whatever the hell weirdness it is she got. I’m all for sushi, but the less fishy the better. Foxy will eat anything. “But if the sex is as good as you say it is… never give up. Good sex is hard to find.”

“Good sex for my sanity, that might be a fair trade.” We break out in giggles, then fall silent as we finish our dinner. When we’ve both stuffed ourselves as much as we can, with only a few pieces of sushi left, we drop our chopsticks and sit back in our chairs, patting the food babies we’re sporting. “Fuck, that was good. I’m stuffed. What about you?”

She gives me a thumbs up with a tired smile. Sushi will do it. I love that my bestie has no problem eating.

“Girl, I’m still not over how hot he was screwing you against the door. That’s some romance novel shit right there.” I roll my eyes because while I think back on it now and realize she’s right, it sure as hell didn’t feel like it at the time. It pulverized my heart before, during, and after, and I was so freaked out that my body could want him so much while everything else screamed at me to stop. I shouldn’t have done it. “But let’s be honest. Romance is some bullshit, no?”

“I mean, I like it just fine, but I’m listening.” I could use a change of subject, and Foxy never fails to have some sort of silliness ready to spew.

“Think about it.” She points at me conspiratorially. I settle in because when she gets this look, I’m in for a bit of a ride. Most of the time, a welcome distraction. “There are millions of romance novels. How many of them actually last? Like an HEA is great, but how realistic is it?”

This earns her a flat look.

This is what she had on her mind? As if real life isn’t hard enough to find someone. Now she has to ruin romance for me?

“Well, for one, it’s fiction and they’re not real people. And two, why don’t you go ahead and squash all my hopes and dreams? The whole point of reading the book is because they get what seems so fucking impossible in real life. A long-lasting love with a guy who knows how to cook, clean, fuck, and makes all the money.”

“Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce,” she states. I shake my head, fighting a laugh because laughing will only encourage her.

“Fiction, Fox. It’s fiction.” I cock my head to the side, waiting for her next argument, because it’s coming.

“But can we agree they aren’t all going to last?” She gets up and kicks off her fox-shaped slippers that she keeps at my place. Then she drops and dips her feet into the pool. I follow suit, sitting close enough our shoulders are touching and lean into her. She places her head on mine.

“Well, if the author says they are, then they will. ‘Cause authors know their characters best.”

“Fine, but still not realistic.”

“You’ve considered this a lot, huh?”

“Yes. I’m scared I have that love, not only with one, but two guys. Does that mean it will not last with one of them?”

“That’s why you’re fighting this so hard?”

She sounds sad when she says, “Yeah. Sometimes Kai pulls away and it really bothers me.” I seek her hand and pull it into mine, holding tight to remind my bestie I’m here for her. Two guys must be a lot to juggle.

“Okay, so we are going to agree that it is fiction. They might not all last but it’s damn good to believe they are all going to grow old together, produce all the babies, all the grandchildren, fuck like rabbits until the end, and die in each other’s arms.” A genuine laugh vibrates her body. “If that doesn’t settle you, then how about instead of an HEA we say HFN?”

“HFN? Happy for now?” She sounds intrigued.

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