Page 87 of The Jester and His Outlaw: Part One

His absence is crippling.He’s lost everything? He didn’t lose me!But he’s likely already written me off, and pushing me away from him is proving the point. He has nothing. Then why did he even come here?

“I’m sure I can find something.” Jonas extends his arm and brushes his hand down my shoulder. I shiver, uncomfortable with his slimy touch. His hands are clammy, like the humidity that suffocates the air despite the lower temperatures of early fall.

“Don’t touch me,” I spit and slap at his hand. He doesn’t bother to jerk his appendage away, only lets us collide with a sharp sound.

Kai and Foxy step out of the woods, the overwhelming scent of weed like a cloud around them. Jensen strides across the yard swiftly to their side, but Kai has his eyes on Jonas.

“Myers,” he booms as Jensen’s arms fall around Foxy, his oversized hand dropping to her hip. She saunters next to him, swinging her hips and his palm dips to the round of her ass. Jonas seeks my brother and his eyes narrow. He snarls. “What the fuck are you doing here? I thought I told you to leave my sister alone?”

Jonas points noncommittally at Kai. “I was invited.”

Moving me to the side, Kai steps up in Jonas’ face. He’s got an inch or so on Jonas, but Jonas is bigger. With Kai’s training, I’m not worried. He can take care of himself. Jonas tilts his chin up to keep their eye contact, and he puffs out his chest. By his sides, his fists pump into tight balls, his knuckles white. I’d rather Kai get into a fight with Jonas than Riggs. Lawyers would meet, and Kai would get a slap on the wrist. Jonas may have more money but neither parent would care to bring the attention to themselves. Riggs, on the other hand, would lose everything he has and likely end up in jail if Jonas were an asshole enough to press charges. News flash, he is.

“You were just uninvited. Get the fuck off my property.” Jonas wants to yell, put hands on my brother, but he doesn’t. With a growl and flaring nostrils, he backs away.

“I’ll see you later, Charley-bear.” The nickname makes my skin crawl, but I don’t acknowledge he even spoke to me. I back myself behind Kai’s protection and make my way over to Foxy and Jensen. Foxy has been watching with keen observance, and she doesn’t look happy in the slightest. That makes two of us.

“You good, babe?” she whispers when I’m close enough. For yet another time, a hand encloses my arm.

CHAPTER40

I knowthat touch but I hate how it makes my heart beat wickedly, belly tingle, and lips yearn. I leave his attention unacknowledged and slide my arm free of Riggs. If he wants to talk to me, then he can say something. Thanking him for interfering with Jonas would be the appropriate thing to do, but I’m in a petty mood.

“Yeah, Foxy, I’m good. Just wishing this damn party was over. I’m sick of having a bunch of fake ass people around that I haven’t talked to since graduation. I can’t believe my parents invited him.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty fucked up, even worse for him to show up. You sure you’re okay?” she asks again. Gentle, warm pressure applies to my hip. I glance down to see an inked up hand curling around my hip bone, cautious. I force myself not to lean into him. He’s so close his breath is on the back of my neck.

“I think I’m just going to go upstairs and go to bed.” Foxy raises her brows and her eyes flash in Riggs’ direction. I roll mine and give her a dull look.

“You sure about that?” She smirks, and I have to fight the urge to tell her to shut the hell up. She’s being ridiculous, and she knows it because before she hugs me, she winks.

“Thanks for coming, Fox. I’ll text you tomorrow?”

“Okay. We can get together and talk, hang by the pool.” I nod with a smile.

Kai and Jensen make sure I’m okay. Both eye the guy standing behind me and escort Foxy off the premises. My parents have sent people home and instead of my classmates giving me their goodbyes, they all disappear. Good riddance. I want nothing to do with them, anyway.

“Can we talk?” Riggs says gingerly as he runs his thumb over my bruise. He touches it with the care of someone who has experienced pain and bruising way too frequently.Abuse to the fullest extent of the word.My chest twinges as his words run through my mind, and I try to put myself in his shoes, try to understand why he would push me away like he did last night.

The wound is still too fresh, too embarrassing to forgive him, but I can at least hear him out, even if my body is betraying me by trying to turn into him. My flesh wants the touch he denied me last night, skin on skin contact, the high of sharing my body with him.

“Why are you here, Riggs?”

“FUCK!” he roars and rakes his fingers through his hair, tugging on the ends of it. He regrets being here. That much is clear. “I don’t fucking know why, Charley. I tried to leave you alone, let you be, let you move on without having to worry about if I’ll hurt you again—”

“That’s not your choice, Riggs,” I cut in, still facing away from him. “That’s my choice if I want you around. I thought I made that choice very clear last night. I wanted you…wantyou.” The strength in his arms grows stronger, and he holds me to him as if I’ll crack like an egg. It’s intimate… his body pressed to mine like this as he towers over me, crooking his neck to bring his lips to my shoulder.

His presence is all-consuming. Overwhelming, like a drug I just can’t quit.

“I want you, Charley. All of you,” he murmurs, sounding husky and my nipples harden—tingling. I shudder, melting into him.

“You have to give me all of you. I don’t want to give up on you, Riggs, but if you keep pushing me away, if you do again what you did last night… I don’t know how much more I can take. Shutting me out is one thing, but pushing me away… I can’t go through that again. My heart can’t take it.” This time, he shudders, squeezing me tighter.

“You shouldn’t be this attached to me, Outlaw. I’m sorry for not pushing you away and keeping you there. I’m sorry I was selfish and made you fall for me.” A shiver of guilt runs through me. He sounds so tortured, so wrecked, so remorseful that he’s made me feel this way about him. Maybe I shouldn’t have pushed so hard. I should have taken his first warning the day I found him smoking after class and stayed away.

Screw that. I wouldn’t trade our time together for anything. Our intellectual conversations, the first time I smoked, the way we nerd out about books, his snuggles in the cafe, or the way his soul calls to mine.

“It’s too late, Jester. I’m already attached and it may be stupid and reckless, but I can’t help it.” I turn in his arms and loop mine around his neck, my heart racing, my mind slowly coming to terms with what he is saying to me, coming to terms with forgiveness and what I’m agreeing to mentally. It isn’t going to be easy being with Riggs, but downright dreadful sometimes.

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