Page 24 of Cruel Love

ASPEN

I thumped my forehead against Phoenix’s steering wheel when I got to the dorm’s parking lot. He might have been injured, but he was also an unhinged asshole. If he had just kept his big mouth shut, he would have been… “Arrrrgh!” I said out loud. “What the fuck do I see in him except everything?”

Maybe I was the unhinged one.

It had to have been a hormonal reaction or something happening because part of his DNA was growing inside me. Otherwise, I would have gotten far away from him. I should have been able to be angry without being swayed by how much I wanted him—how much I liked him. And I really wanted him in a powerful, potent way that put him into the I-can’t-stop-thinking-about-him category.

I was trying not to dump everything onto my best friend, but I needed to talk to him. I messaged Max and asked if he had time to talk to a crazy person. He sent a laughing emoji and said he’d be right down.

When he got there, I unleashed, mostly about how much I wanted to climb Phoenix like a tree even though he had been a total asshole. I was so confused. Since the accident, he’d been nothing but sweet and open. But then someone—that bitch Jillian—told him about the pregnancy, and he lost his fucking mind.

“You’re not crazy, baby girl.” Max mussed my hair then stole a few of my ever-present saltines.

I hugged the pillow, pressing it more tightly to my chest, and tried not to hyperventilate. I mirrored my friend’s cross-legged position on my bed and took two deep breaths, resisting the urge to scream into the pillow.

“To address your raging hormones.” He shoved a cracker into his mouth, and I impatiently waited for him to chew and swallow. “When my sister was pregnant, there were a few months when she would’ve happily humped a flagpole because her husband was at work. It’s normal for your sex drive to be out of control.”

“That’s not the only problem.” I hugged the pillow tighter. “I don’t find anyone else nearly as attractive as Phoenix.”

“I’m not surprised.” He fanned himself dramatically, coaxing a smile from me. “You two are volatile. All that repressed passion. Sparks literally fly off you when you’re around each other. Combine that and the hormones, and I’m surprised you haven’t ripped each other’s clothes off in the middle of the quad.”

I laughed. “That would be something to see. Can you imagine Jillian’s face? And some of the others she’s friends with?”

He chuckled. “That would make it all worth it.” Max bopped my nose with an index finger before his smile died and his voice lost the teasing edge. “I’m not a huge Phoenix fan, but from what you’ve told me, this brain-damaged version of him is softer than he used to be. So I say go for it. If you need to quench your thirst, you should.”

I nodded. “It’s ridiculous that I haven’t already.” I rolled my eyes. “It’s not like I’ll get pregnant again.”

Max snickered.

I released some of my grip on the pillow and leaned back a little. “What’s going on with you? How did your date with Jaxon go? I can’t believe you haven’t shared anything with me yet.” I smacked him on the leg. Max’s cheeks pinked, and I couldn’t help but tease. “That good, huh?”

“He’s… unexpected.” His voice had taken on a dreamy quality that settled my nerves.

“You like him.”

“Yeah, I do. I just didn’t expect how much.” His lips turned up at the corners, and he laughed at himself. “We talked about art when we were at dinner. He kept the conversation going, and it was nice because I usually feel that’s on me.”

“It’s your personality. Your charm draws people to you.” He smirked, and I swatted at him again. “Seriously.”

“We’re going out again this weekend.” He grinned and looked away. “I like him a lot.”

“I’m happy for you.”

Max’s face lost the dreamy look, and he squeezed one of my hands. “What else happened? I know you’re holding back.”

I was. I told him about finding Phoenix on the floor and how his legs must have given out. Then I admitted that I’d gone there to talk about the pregnancy and all of the rest.

“He’s an asshole.”

I pointed at him. “Yep.”

“But… hmm.” Max looked pained. “I hate to come to his defense. I despise it. However, the guy learned he would be a father while his life is an epic shit-show. Then you found him at a disadvantage, and anyone would be embarrassed not to be able to get up on their own.” He nodded. “I’m placing money on utter humiliation as causing a majority of his assholery today. Not that it’s right. Don’t think I’m going there, but it explains his reaction.”

The tension eased from my shoulders, and I hugged Max because what he said made so much sense. Phoenix was a dominant guy, probably always the strong one. From what I’d observed and heard about him and the rest of his family from the girls, he wasn’t used to relying on others. If we could get past him being a jerk—which could be expedited with an apology from him—then maybe we could move on to my more pressing needs. He’d been the one to suggest something like that before with all the are-you-my-girlfriend questions and the kiss… God, that kiss.

“Not to change the subject while you’re drooling over him in your mind.”

I tossed a pillow at his head, laughing.

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