Page 29 of Created in Chaos

“Did they tell you the reason for the meeting? That we wanted to make sure everyone knew you were one of us?” she questions quickly, making me think she assumed I knew about the assembly.

“Something like that,” I agree without real confirmation. “Why didn’t you claim me as part of your family before, if it is such an issue?”

“There are rules and traditions that must be followed, but we should have expedited the process. Please believe me when I say we had no idea someone would actually hurt you.”

“Then why make Alden my protector?”

I don’t think she expected me to question her, or maybe she’s just used to not having to explain herself, but either way, she’s quiet for a moment before answering. “He was more of a deterrent than anything else, Nova, something to remind the Morningstars you were off-limits, but I don’t suppose it was enough.” It’s clear she’s blaming them for the attack without coming right out and saying it.

Nox’s palm rubs over my back, as if he’s reminding me that he’s here and she’s not telling the truth. I turn to give him a small smile, but it’s forced, and I’m sure he knows it.

“Did you make my mom choose between my dad and staying on the island and being part of your family?”

“I thought we already addressed this, Nova.” There’s a note of impatience in her tone.

“I want to make sure I understand.”

“Your mother knew about the sacrifices that must be made for the larger picture. She was loose with her heart and made a choice I know she regretted. As a matter of fact, I’d spoken with your mother just a few days before the accident. She asked to return home.”

The information about bowls me over, but I try not to give any outward signs. “When did you speak with her?”

“Several times. In fact, she was planning on bringing you home to us.”

Lucian sits forward at Astrid’s claim, as if he needs to be closer to hear her clearly.

“Really?” I sound skeptical, but I can’t help it. “What about my dad?”

“We can talk about this more at length when you are home. Family matters are private.” She shuts down that line of questioning, but I can’t take her word as gospel. My mom loved my dad. She put up with him losing countless jobs, which resulted in us moving around a lot, but she never wavered in her support of him. Looking back, I wonder if there were times when things would have been different if she expected more from him, or if she was so tolerant of his behavior because she felt guilty about how much she was drinking.

“Why not just come out and tell me he wasn’t welcome and that he wasn’t good enough to be a founder? That’s what you think, right?”

“I don’t expect you to understand the responsibilities foisted upon us yet, Nova, but I hope you can acknowledge your mother did a disservice to you by indulging in her whims.”

“Her whims? That’s what you think of my dad?”

“Your mother was engaged to be married when she fled with your father. Most days, I think she did it to spite me. There’s no way she could have actually loved him.” Astrid’s irritation with me and my questions seems to have hit a boiling point, considering her biting tone.

“I appreciate your honesty, but you can rest comfortably knowing the world doesn’t revolve around you, Grandmother. I doubt she was thinking of you at all when she was with him.”

Nox makes a snorting noise to cover his laugh, but I don’t find anything funny. Lucian, on the other hand, is looking at me like a proud father.

“Nova.” Her pitch is condescending yet pleading in the same breath. “I’ll admit my flaw. Your father is a sore subject. He took my only daughter from me, something I hope you never have to deal with. Please excuse my harsh judgment. I didn’t mean it.”

“Oh, I’m quite certain you meant every word. At least I know how easy it is to be disowned by you, and hey, you’re a pro at dealing with the consequences. It should be easier this time around.” I hit the red phone icon to end the call, but the anger filling me doesn’t die so easily.

I tighten my fingers around the device in my hand, ready to chuck it to the floor, but I’m not wasteful enough to actually do it. “Need something to take out all that frustration on, lamb?” Lucian widens his arms in offering.

I glare at him, thinking about how good it would feel to hit something, but I’m not that person and I don’t want to be. Giving her that much control over me would only mean I let her win.

“I’m not going to hit you.”

“I wouldn’t mind if you did, but there are other ways to alleviate all that annoyance if violence isn’t what you’re up for.”

“I’m worried that you would even offer,” I confess, wondering if someone else hurt him in the past.

“Don’t give me those doe eyes. I’m not that fucked up. I would never allow anyone else the privilege of touching, let alone hitting me. Besides, I never thought it was hot before you started threatening me, so it’s kind of your fault.”

“You realize this is like the definition of red flag, right?” I wave my finger between the three of us, making sure to include sweet Nox in the equation, because there is no way what’s happening between all three of us is healthy.

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