Page 78 of Only for Christmas

His pupils were starting to dilate. ‘It had to happen sometime. No one can live on carrots their whole life.’

‘I guess. But I thought there’d be something in the interim, you know? Like a gradual slipping. Testing the water before diving in. With you it feels full-on, no holds barred, binge-eating an entire fridge in one go.’ She blinked up at him. ‘You’re a hard man to resist.’

His eyes locked on hers. ‘So don’t.’

‘You’re leaving. Which is the confusing part.’

‘How so?’

Her mouth was suddenly dry. ‘Well, part of me thinks: you’re leaving, so I can indulge in the safe knowledge it can’t go anywhere. I can return to being alone and pathetic after you’ve gone, no permanent damage done. But the other part of me is like: why torture yourself by eating a whole box of doughnuts when after Tuesday sugar will be off the menu. The crash could be fatal.’ She shook her head, confusing herself with thoughts of doughnuts and sugar rushes. ‘But then I think: will it make any difference? I like you regardless. I’m not going to miss you any less whether I’ve eaten doughnuts or not. Are you following any of this?’

‘It’s a lot, I’ll admit. Can we go back to the “turned on” bit?’ He must have clocked her expression, because he said, ‘Oh, right, that was the “turned on” bit. I’m with you now. Does it help if I tell you last night was incredible? And that I could’ve cursed Mrs Kelsey for interrupting us?’

‘It’s just as well she did. If I’m being honest, I don’t think I would’ve stopped otherwise.’

He let out a low moan. ‘Can you warn me next time you’re going to be this honest? I need to prepare myself.’ His smile turned playful. ‘So tell me what would’ve happened next?’

‘I’m not going to indulge you by spelling it out.’

‘Not even a little? Did it involve fruity body lotion?’ The wanting in his eyes grew, and they may well have picked up where they left off last night, if it hadn’t been for Carla interrupting them.

‘Lucas! You made it! You must come and meet Vince,’ she said, jostling her way through the dancers. ‘He’s just transferred from the same hospital you’ll be working at in Houston. How’s that for a coincidence? I told him you’d want to pick his brains. You don’t mind if I borrow him for a moment, do you, Sarah?’

Still a little unsteady from the heat building between them, she shook her head. ‘No, it’s fine.’

Lucas still had hold of her hand. ‘Now’s not a great time, Carla.’

‘It’s fine, really.’ Sarah reassured him. ‘I need to use the ladies’ room anyway. You go with Carla.’

Lucas lowered his voice. ‘You sure? I said I wouldn’t leave you.’

‘Absolutely.’ A break from him was probably for the best. Her tongue had loosened past the point of propriety. ‘You can hardly come into the loo with me.’

He kissed her hand before letting go. ‘Come and find me straight afterwards.’

‘Sure.’ Sarah waved as Carla dragged him away, and then she went in search of the ladies’.

There was a long queue for the toilets close by, so she followed the signs for the loos inside the museum. There was a display of African fashion in the main area and Sarah stopped to admire the outfits, colourful and bold. It was nice to be away from the noise for a while. The quiet of the exhibition hall was a welcome respite.

She studied the animal prints and mismatch of geometric patterns. She should wear more colour, she decided. Her wardrobe had dampened like her mood over the years and she now favoured muted tones. It seemed everything in her life needed a kickstart, not just her love life.

‘Admiring the exhibition?’ She turned to see Stephen Stokes standing behind her.

Panic raced through her veins. ‘I was looking for the ladies’… Excuse me.’ She attempted to stride past, but he blocked her escape.

‘I’m glad I caught you. You owe me an apology.’

The gap he’d left wasn’t big enough for her to get through. ‘An apology? What for?’

He placed a hand on the wall, creating a barrier. ‘The accusations you made the other night.’

‘The night you showed up at my flat, you mean?’ She tried to sound authoritative, but the shake in her voice gave her away.

‘I’ve tried my best to be supportive, Sarah, but you seemed determined to wilfully misunderstand me. I don’t appreciate having my good intentions being labelled as inappropriate. And I certainly don’t appreciate being threatened.’

She backed up a step; she didn’t like his menacing tone. ‘In what way did I threaten you?’

‘All that nonsense about lawsuits and complaints, when I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong.’ He moved towards her, forcing her backwards. ‘All I’ve done is be supportive and accommodating, and instead of thanking me for taking an interest in your career, you’ve shown nothing but ingratitude and insubordination. If anyone has the right to make a complaint, it’s me.’

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