Page 53 of The Damaged Billionaire

“I think of Dad often too.” He nods, watching me carefully.

“Not just Dad, but Nanny Helen,” I admit.

“Helen?” The look on his face is one of bewilderment.

“Yeah, I have been thinking of her a lot lately.”

“I am surprised you even remember her.”

“She was more of a mother to me than Mom was.” Our mom was no mother. Just a woman who was around the house growing up.

“Yeah, but she died so long ago.” All us boys had nannies, and I am sure that both Harrison and Ben both still visit theirs, funding their retirement completely. Something I didn’t get the opportunity to do.

“You know, I feel like there is something weird about it all,” I say to him, finally voicing the things I have been thinking about.

“What do you mean?”

“The night she died.”

“You always said you couldn’t remember,” he says curiously, now sitting forward on his seat.

“I never could, until Willow got my heart beating again after years of ignoring the world and my feelings. She had me assessing everything about my life from the first moment we met in New York, and I haven’t stopped since. I have this one memory of Helen that I can’t see properly, but I think…” I tell him, my brain scrambling to pull it all together.

“What?”

“I just think she didn’t die of heart failure.” I sigh. “It is all I have. A feeling. I wish I could grasp it, but I can’t.”

“Maybe look into that day. Talk to her family. Maybe that will help you get through the mental block. Seems like it weighs you down and you have enough going on right now. It could be good to clear the old clutter completely,” Harrison offers, and he is right.

“I think I might need to go to Singapore for this deal,” I put it out there, then look at Harrison, seeing when the penny drops.

“Maybe you should. Take Eddie with you and stop over in Indonesia on the way? It may help you to see her family in person.” I nod. My Singapore deal is going through rapidly. Things moved quickly once I had a clear vision, the right contacts, and no competitor standing in my way. Even though the media locally is having a fucking field day about my sperm count, it doesn’t even make the news in Asia. So it is full steam ahead on that project.

“Willow said the Business News interview will go out in a week or so after the media storm blows over. This deal in Singapore is happening regardless of your sex life antics, so maybe you should fly out tomorrow?” Harrison says, and I take a breath.

“Maybe I should fly out tonight.” I look at him for confirmation that I am making the right decision, and he nods. So, I make the calls to Eddie and Melody and pack a bag.

It’s time to do the right thing.

CHAPTER THIRTY TWO - WILLOW

I sit on the sofa and take a deep breath. It has fast become my new resting place. I have been working ridiculous hours for the last week, and the only chance I get to stop has been when I have taken five minutes just to sit, right here on this sofa.

Things are calming down. But I am still on edge. It is not totally out of character for me. When any of my clients has a hiccup such as this, I work all day and all night to mitigate it. And now I see the dust settling. Even though there is still an interest and an air of intrigue, the local media have spun this story to death already, and with no updates or additional information, they have started to move on to other topics.

Of course it helps if other people offer themselves up for scandal and the media jump on them instead. Disgraced baseball player and former Maryland loveable jock, David Taylor Smith, apparently has new charges against him, something about tax evasion and mismanagement of business funds. My business might be about solving my clients' battles, but I have a healthy relationship with many journalists, and so I have used that to my full advantage this week.

While we are now over the big issue and no longer the hot topic, there is still uncertainty lurking around the paternity of the child. I speak to Tennyson almost every day, and his stance has not wavered. He swears he used a condom and doesn’t believe the child is his. Katerina, on the other hand, is adamant and is stalling on the medical requirements regarding paternity. It is one hot mess of a situation. We can’t force her, and we certainly don’t want any harm coming to the baby. Her being stressed at this situation, her doctor tells us, is not helping. As newly pregnant, she needs to remain stress free. But whether we know now or in eight months’ time, we will have an answer eventually.

All that is left for me to decide is where that leaves Tennyson and me. I have thought of not much else but him this past week. Saide and Josh have been around but have kept a wide berth from me, knowing that I need to focus and have mental clarity at a time like this. But in the dark, quiet times, when I am lying in bed and unable to sleep, I think about him. I think about how I am in love with him. I am not sure when it happened. But it did.

Can I overcome this situation? Can I move forward with him with this cloud over us? He told me he loved me that night he drunkenly fell asleep on my sofa, but I doubt he remembers. And people say a lot of things when they are under the influence of alcohol. But I can feel it. When we are together, it is a happiness I have never known. And I know he feels it too.

So what if he is having a baby with another woman? It was a one-night stand, before we were even together. There is no love there. It is not her bed that he is in, not her phone he is calling. I am adult enough to understand that these things happen and to be honest and deal with the outcomes that come from it. But I can’t deny the anxiety that swirls inside of me when I think about telling him I can’t bear his children. That if he wants me, then a baby is not in our future. I need to be strong enough to tell him I can’t give him that and I need to be strong enough to let him go if it’s something he wants.

My phone startles me from my thoughts, and I grab it quickly, my adrenaline not calming for a second. It is an unknown number, but I pick it up regardless.

“Willow Valentine,” I say professionally.

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