Page 111 of Merciless

“I promise you, Alana. I’m going to look after you. No one is going to touch you ever again.”

“T-touch me?” I whisper.

He’s silent for a few seconds and when I look up, I catch his throat work on a thick swallow.

“I know, Alana. And I hate that it’s taken me this long to do anything about it.”

“You know.” The words are barely a whisper as shame burns through me.

“I’m sorry, Doll. I’m really fucking sorry.”

Despite the fact none of this is his fault in any way, for the first time in my life, I actually believe words that come from a man’s mouth.

“If I could have done something sooner, I would. I need you to believe that.”

Releasing my vise-like grip on my bag, I rest my other hand on top of his, sandwiching it between mine.

“I believe you.”

“You have every right not to trust me, I understand that. But I’m going to prove to you that you can. I’m on your side.”

A sob rips from my throat. They’re words I never thought I’d hear, but ones I’ve been dreaming about for so long.

Kristie always made it easier. We never talked about what I was being forced to endure; she was too young and I did everything I could think of to protect her from it. But her presence, her smile, her laughter, her friendship, it helped.

Without her, there’s nothing. No reprieve, no happiness, no joy.

We drive in silence for the longest time as I repeat his words over and over in my head, trying to convince myself not to believe them. But I do. Despite my head telling me not to trust him, my gut and my heart say otherwise.

It’s not until we’re pulling down the street to his house that my fear takes over.

“Y-your dad?” I ask, hating that he can feel my hands trembling.

“MOTHERFUCKER,” he bellows, making me shriek in fright and curl in on myself as he repeatedly slams his hand down on the wheel. “Shit. Fuck. I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he says in a rush when he realizes the result of his outburst. “I’ll kill him for this, Alana. I’ll kill all of them. I fucking promise you that.”

His body vibrates with anger, but unlike what I usually experience, it’s not directed at me.

“No one is ever going to touch you again, okay?” he says softer, just about managing to rein in his fury.

I nod, unable to do anything but agree.

“Dad is never at this house. He lives with Shelly and the kids. I’ll make sure he doesn’t show up or find you.”

Ripping my eyes from his, I stare up at the house.

It’s old and run-down just like the one I ran from not so long ago, but it’s not as scary. A monster might own it, but if Mav is right then… it might be safe.

“Come on, let’s get you inside.”

He kills the engine and throws his door open, but despite wanting to follow and agreeing that I’ll probably be safer inside if half the town is out looking for me, I can’t move.

“Fucking hell,” he mutters when he pulls my door open and stares down at me.

I’ve no idea what he sees. Honestly, I’m glad I can’t see the same thing.

I’m weak, pathetic, and terrified. Everything I don’t want to be.

But this is what they’ve done. They’ve broken me down until there’s barely anything left.