Page 46 of Savage

I hope you are doing well, or at least better than I am these days. It’s been almost a year since we last spoke, and I’m still dealing with a heavy heart and a head full of questions. I’ve tried to make sense of what happened between us, but I keep coming up at a complete loss.

When you ended things, it felt like the ground was pulled from beneath me. I still feel that way. I know it might seem stupid to you, but I never saw it coming. I thought things were good between us. I've replayed our last conversation over and over, searching for clues or hints as to why you decided to break things off. But I've come up empty-handed.

I really wanted to talk to you—not just about the breakup, but something else important. I tried calling and coming by the clubhouse, but I was always turned away. I’ve written letter after letter. I have no idea if you knew I was pregnant or not. I tried to tell you. Countless times.

Anyway, I had him. His name is Dalton, and he’s beautiful, Malcomb. He’s the most beautiful baby. He’s got my lips and rounded nose, but he has your eyes and lopsided grin. He’s strong and healthy, and he has such a soft temperament—I think he gets that from me. I wish so much that you could see him and hold him.

I just know you would love him the way I do.

I still don’t know how we got here. I don’t know how to fix it, but I do know that you’ve never lied to me, Malcomb. Never once. I have no reason to believe that you lied to me that day, but I do. I think you lied about everything. I think you still love me, and if that is the case, please answer me.

If I’m wrong and you really meant all those things you said, then I’ll find a way to move on. If I don’t hear back from you, I will consider that your answer. I will stop trying to reach out and let you live your life.

But please know, my heart is still yours.

I fear it always will be.

Sincerely,

Londyn

Fuck me.

I’d been such a goddamn fool. She knew me better than anyone. Of course, she knew I still loved her and wanted her—even when I did everything in my power to prove otherwise. My silence had made her think I’d turned my back on her and our kid.

But that wasn’t the case.

Not even close.

Londyn had always been the one for me. I knew that. Hell, everyone knew it. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see her or talk to her or read her letters. I couldn’t. I knew it would only make it that much harder to keep myself from trying to get her back.

But she didn’t know that.

She just knew I wouldn’t talk to her.

The thought made me think of Candace and the asshole who’d left her in the lurch. She barely knew the guy, but it still fucked her up that he’d cut her off. And I blamed him one hundred percent. I didn’t know him. I didn’t know his story. Didn’t care to know. I just knew he’d fucked over my friend and left her to deal with a pregnancy scare on her own.

And without even knowing what I was doing, I’d done the same to Londyn.

Damn.

I swallowed hard, feeling the lump in my throat grow as I read another letter. Each one left me engulfed with emotion. I’d missed so much, years with her and time with Dalton, and I only had myself to blame. I had to fix it, and I have to fix it now. And there was only one way to do that.

I needed to see her.

There was just one problem.

I had no idea where she lived.

I needed Bones—the club’s hacker. I would’ve just gone down to his room, but it was late. He was more than likely with Elsie, so I grabbed my phone from my back pocket and dialed his number. After a couple of rings, he answered, “You got Bones.”

“Hey, brother. I hate to call so late, but I need you to do something for me.”

“Yeah, no problem.” He cleared his throat, then asked, “What do ya need?”

“I need you to find some information on someone.”

“Okay. Give me a second.” I could hear him shuffling around, and moments later, he was back. “What’s the name?”

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