Page 42 of Role Model

“Theo’s got it down to a science.”

Troy glanced at the bus, which seemed to have everyone but him on it now. “Well. I should...”

“Yeah. See you tomorrow.”

For a moment, both men just stared at each other, Harris beaming and Troy’s lips curving slightly upward. His gaze dropped to Harris’s mouth, then back to his eyes.

Then he blinked and said, “See you later, Harris.”

He got on the bus without looking back, and Harris sauntered over to the van, where a giant beaver was probably waiting for him.

Chapter Ten

Over the next week, Harris was visited by Troy three times. He felt like Ebenezer Scrooge, except instead of spirits, he got a sullen hockey player who was, like, the Ghost of Christmas Mixed Messages.

He appeared and disappeared as suddenly as a ghost, that was for sure. But he always brought coffee, and Harris didn’t mind having him around. Even though he continued to be distractingly hot.

Sometimes Troy would ask questions. Sometimes he would ask weird questions out of the blue that had nothing to do with Harris’s job.

“Have you ever brought, like, a date to any hockey stuff? Team parties or whatever?”

That was today’s random question. Harris paused, mid-email. “Usually I’m pretty busy working at official team events, but there were a couple of house parties where I brought someone.”

Troy didn’t reply, so Harris went back to writing his email.

“Like, a boyfriend? You brought a boyfriend?”

Harris turned in his chair. “More like guys I was hoping would be my boyfriend. Why?”

“Everyone was cool with it?”

Troy seemed to ask a lot of variations of this same question. “As far as I could tell. It’s not like we were making out wildly. I might have kissed them quickly. Maybe sat with an arm around them.”

Troy was absolutely destroying his coffee cup lid. He’d folded it in half twice somehow, and Harris was worried he was going to cut himself on the jagged plastic. “Do you worry about it? People judging you. Like, when you’re in a group of straight people?”

Harris wanted to say that he didn’t worry about it at all, but it wasn’t exactly true. “Sometimes, I guess. I’ve been lucky with the support I’ve gotten from my family and friends, so I don’t worry about it as much as some people, but sure. There’s always something in the back of my head that puts me on edge a bit. Especially if I don’t know everyone in the room.”

Troy let the coffee lid pop back out into a rough-looking circle, then began folding it again. “How do you—” He sighed. “Do you just tell that thing in the back of your head to shut up or something?”

“Basically.” Harris carefully reached out and took the lid from Troy’s hands. He tossed it into the trash can by his desk. “I try to do what feels right to me. What’s honest, y’know? And if someone has a problem with it, well, we were never going to be friends anyway.”

Troy was staring at his empty hands, frowning. “That’s good,” he said, though he sounded miserable. “Why didn’t they want to be your boyfriend?”

Harris was beyond confused now. “Who?”

“The guys that you brought to parties. That you said you’d hoped would be your boyfriend.”

“Oh.” Harris flushed. “I don’t know. Different reasons, probably.”

“You should have a boyfriend.” Now it was Troy’s turn to blush, which was so cute Harris couldn’t stand it. “I mean. There’s no reason why you shouldn’t. Um.” He chewed his lip nervously, and Harris was going to die. “You’re, like, nice. And not, y’know, ugly.”

Harris laughed. “Jesus. Thanks.”

“No, I mean—” Troy’s eyes were wide with horror, like he couldn’t believe he’d just said that. Harris kept laughing until suddenly, miraculously, Troy joined him. It started as a shaky exhale that formed into full-blown laughter. Troy’s eyes crinkled and his wonderful, rare smile spread across his face.

“Forget I said anything,” Troy said, though he was still smiling. “I don’t know what I was trying to say.”

Harris didn’t either, because at the moment he was completely dazed by Troy’s smile and couldn’t remember any words at all. It wasn’t until Troy’s face fell back into its usual blank frown that Harris was able to say, “I’ve had a couple of boyfriends. Real ones. But not for a while now. I mostly use a dating app, but not many of those dates have led to a second one lately.”

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