Page 140 of Leave Me Broken

It’s not Payson who opens the door, it’s Janelle. I wonder how she feels about Luca fucking her, then eating Payson out in the same night. Luca said what they did was casual, but you never know if she will feel the same. She grins seeing me but it slips a little when she actually looks at me. “You okay, Coach? You look busted.”

“Where is Payson?”

“Pay!” she calls, not taking her eyes off me. “Let me see the tattoo.”

Tattoo? Oh, my newest one. Word spreads fast amongst girls, I see, because someone else, I’m guessing Ronni, shouts about wanting to see it too. Janelle pulls me into the room. Monica and Emika are here as well, but I scan the room looking for the one I’m actually here for. She is propped on her bed, grinning at me like I hung the stars. I take a deep breath. Another thing about girls is their perfumes, they don’t always mix. It smells good in the room but like a perfume tester store. Besides that subtle smell of vanilla and rainwater. I suck in a deep breath and head her way.

I jump over her body and lie next to her, pulling her into my chest. Throw an arm behind my head and the other I wrap around her waist.

She smiles up to me and I smile down to her. “Hi.”

“Hi.”

Janelle kneels on the foot of the bed with her phone in front of her face. Snapping several photos of us. Then she promises to send them to Payson.

“Okaaaay, now show us the tattoo,” Monica singsongs.

Payson giggles and beckons me so she can whisper, “Ronni saw mine, but I didn’t show anyone else. She spilled the beans about your tattoo.”

Ahh.

Payson pulls me to my knees and lifts my shirt enough to show my latest tattoo. The girls ooo and ahh until I’ve had enough of their attention and drop back onto the bed.

“When are you getting yours, Pay?” Monica grins.

Payson flushes a deep pink. And Ronni hits me with a knowing look, not exactly a happy one either. “Maybe when I can legally get a tattoo,” she teases.

The girls fall into an easy conversation about tattoos they like or don’t like, and I press my lips to the base of Payson’s ear. “How was your night?”

She chews on her lips, pondering my question for a while. “Good. Surprising, informative, but good.” She drops her voice and crawls farther up my body. “I missed you, though.”

“You have no idea how good that feels to hear because I have been miserable.”

I tilt my head back when she nuzzles her nose into my neck. She kisses me and licks before pulling away and glancing back at her friends. I don’t know if they are watching, they are talking so maybe not, but it’s not like I care. I’ve missed her too much to care. Which is why I grab her hips and roll us and position myself between her legs. My stomach is on her panties so it’s not overly inappropriate.

Who am I kidding? Everything Payson and I do is inappropriate. I’m her coach for bloody sake.

Something I seem to forget often.

45

Payson

I stare into my best friend’s eyes, still in my groggy state from the nap we took after seeing Ronni off at the airport. Apparently she woke up before me, and during my sleep, I must have removed my sweatshirt. I don’t remember doing it but when Janelle woke up, she got a clear look at my newest cuts. “Jay—”

“You’re fucking cutting again?” She doesn’t waste another second before storming out of our room and into the hallway.

“Janelle!” I run after her. She bangs on Ash’s door and my stomach twists.

“Don’t even try and stop me. I warned you the last time and I shouldn’t have even waited then. I’m not making the same mistake now. Ash! Open up!”

“He did it!” I slap a hand to my mouth after the words slip out.

Janelle’s fist freezes right before she’s about to slam it into the door again. “He what?”

I swallow thickly because I’m not awake enough for this conversation but also, I don’t know what to say. Janelle won’t understand my need to cut and Ash’s need to keep me from cutting. I’m thinking blood play isn’t in Janelle’s wheelhouse.

The door opens.

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