Page 91 of Touch in the Dark

“My dad knows a guy, who… has a lot of businesses and… his son is a chef.”

I turn to her fully. “Really?”

“What’s his name?” she asks softly.

I swallow, then tell her. “Derrick Atwater.”

“Holy shit,” Elsa breathes out, her back curving as she bends forward slightly. “I’m not in the habit of hanging around with dad’s friends, but Derick Atwater visited our house when we were younger, and mom hosted dinner parties. I know the Atwater kids better than I know him.”

“Fuck,” I laugh out in surprise. I never expected this. She hung out with his kids? With my… half-siblings? I’m fucking blown away by this.

“Not that I’ve seen them in years, and I never really had anything in common with any of them, it was more forced mingling when they attended the parties with their parents. His daughter Roisin is actually a bit of a bitch. She used to pick on one of my sisters all the time.” Elsa stops talking and quickly covers her mouth with a hand.

“Relax,” I tell her. “It’s not like I know them.”

“But you might want to, and you can’t go into that thinking that she’s horrible. I mean… That was when we were kids, and she is probably really different now.”

I take her hand and pull it onto my lap. She stops talking and just stares at me, anything to do with my breaking her heart is forgotten now. I should be glad, but I’m not sure I am.

“Are you sure he’s your father?” she asks.

“I can’t confirm anything until we have a DNA test. Here,” I pull my phone from my pocket and find the picture I took of the photograph. I pass it over to her and see her staring, not at Atwater, but at my mom. She is stunning and her smile is so huge. That was one of the things that bothered me the most about this, how happy she is. Knowing she died alone, never having shared any more smiles with the asshole standing next to her.

“Your mom was really beautiful,” she says softly.

“Thanks.”

“And yeah… Wow, you look more like him than his other kids,” she slaps my phone back in my hand and looks at me in horror.

“You’re on a roll,” I tell her.

“I’m sorry, it’s just…I’m sorry, Nick. This must be really hard for you.”

“I’m trying not to think about it too much, I want to let the PI do her thing then worry about what comes after,” I say as I look around. The beach is still really quiet, but there is nothing much here. I get to my feet and reach for Elsa’s hand. “I don’t know about you, but I could use a drink.”

She lets me pull her up, standing close to me, my hand still wrapped around hers. Then she nods.

“I could do with more than one drink.”

“I know a place,” I say as she bends to pick up the blanket and her shoes on the way back to the stairs.

I let her go up ahead of me, telling myself its so I can catch her if she slips, and not so I can watch her ass as it moves with the motion of her steps, right in front of my face. Elsa is quiet on the drive over and for once, I’m fine with that, both of us lost in our own thoughts. I’m still trying to process she knows the man who potentially, more than likely, is my father.

Duke’s Barefoot Bar is fairly quiet, and no one is interested in us when we arrive. The place is set up to look like a Hawaiian beach side bar. We get a table close to the edge of the beach and order margaritas. Elsa picks up a menu and pumps her fist with a grin.

“It’s Taco Tuesday.”

“Go for it,” I say in amusement with a nod to the menu.

It’s getting close to four, it’s been a while since we ate and I’m hungry too, plus it will help soak up any alcohol I drink. We order a couple of Taco’s each and I sit back, marvelling at how weird this day has been. I never in a million years thought I’d be spending it with Elsa. I wanted to tell her about my past and my current predicament to try and prove I’m serious about changing. I meant it when I said I want a second chance. Didn’t quite turn out that way but she doesn’t seem to be in any rush to get away from me.

“Okay, so if we forget about the fact that my dad knows Derrick, what is the private investigator doing for you?” Elsa asks, sipping her drink.

“I’ve asked her to find out everything she can around my birthdate. To see if she can find out where he was then, and general information on who he is, what he’s like.” I shrug. “I’ve never done anything like this before, but I don’t think contacting out of the blue and asking him to do a DNA test will go down well.”

“No, probably not,” she rummages in her purse for a moment and takes out a hair tie, pulling her long unruly hair out of her face. The wind is picking up slightly. “But the end goal is to meet him?” She looks at me, sees the indecisiveness on my face. “It’s okay Nick, it’s a huge step. Just finding out his name must have been a shock, especially the way you did it. Did you tell anyone else about this?”

“Arch knows. It was his idea to come here, try and figure out what we could before I decide how I want to approach this. And Jenna knows too.”

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