Page 99 of The Loathing

No matter how far I ran. He would outrun me every single time.

He was a tracker.

I was the prey.

Letting my head fall forward, I shake it softly.

I wish I could say I am disappointed; I’m not.

I’m just numb to it all. Trying to block it all out.

Pacing back towards the bedroom, I slip back past the bed and walk round my side. My fingers find the hem of my silk black shorts as I fiddle. My eyes are glued to Titus when I see him stir, maybe he knows I am watching him. I panic, climbing back into bed quickly and cover myself up. I feel Titus’ arm land over me, pulling me into him and his face nuzzling into my wild red hair. I don’t move, but I feel my own eyes fall heavy again as I slip into a slumber.

Rolling over, sleep still full in my eyes Titus is awake, resting his elbow on the pillow and his head sitting on his hand.

“Morning Twilight,” he smiles, leaning in and giving me a soft kiss on the forehead and I never thought forehead kisses would become a favourite of mine.

“I fell back asleep,” I sigh, stretching up.

“When were you awake?” he asks, his brows furrowed.

“Early hours this morning,” I yawn, rubbing my eyes.

“Obviously needed that sleep,” he winks, his hand rubbing over my stomach, and I feel my insides knot and burn, the wanting ache between my legs blossoming and I am desperate to have his hands on me where no man ever has before.

“Obviously; think the margaritas helped…” I roll my lips and pull my eyes from his, letting them settle on the ceiling. My fucking heart is skipping beats.

“Do you remember much from last night?” he asks nonchalant.

Balls.

“Everything,” I manage to breathe out, not quite sure why I have lost my voice.

“And you still want this?” Titus asks, and I can tell he is hesitant. I mean he is twice my age and I’ve asked him to take my purity.

I nod, unable to speak.

“Are you sure… because once… I mean… we’re going to cross a line…”

“Do you not want this? Is this what you’re doing?” I snap and then I grimace, wincing.

“Baby…” he coos, placing his hand on my cheek and turning it so I have to look at him. “It’s not like that… I know you say it’s not precious to you, but it should be. It’s not something you just give away.” His voice trails off and I feel my agitation begin to rise.

“Just forget it,” I sigh, pulling his hand from my face and roll over on my side to face the window and I know I am acting like a spoiled brat.

“Amora…” his voice is low and silky, his lips pressing to the shell of my ear and I feel the shivers dance up and down my back causing my skin to explode in goosebumps, but burning at the same time. “I don’t want to forget it; I didn’t mean it that way…” he pauses and I still ignore him. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay with this… that’s all.”

And guilt stings me.

I turn my head to face him, my face softening, my eyes falling to his lips.

“I have never been surer.”

A hint of a smile graces his lips and silence consumes us for a while.

“Have you done anything before?” and my cheeks burn with humiliation, but I shake my head from side to side slowly.

His brows raise but he says nothing.