Page 140 of The Loathing

“I had to sort some bits out back home…” his voice trails off and I ignore the stabbing pain that is currently slicing through my heart.

“Okay,” I nod and I know I have no right to even feel anything other than regret because it was me who pushed him away but I did it for his own good. I done it because I have no other option than for this to be my new life.

“You ready to go?” he looks at his watch and his brows furrow.

“Yeah,” I mumble as I walk ahead, and he is now back to being five steps behind and I don’t miss the way my heart beats when he isn’t close to me. It stutters in my chest.

* * *

We sit in silence as Titus drives us into the city of London. He follows his Sat Nav and we drive past my old work building and my eyes begin to well. I miss my old life; I miss the person I was and just being here in the City I love the most is just a reminder at what I have lost.

I feel his hand slip between my thighs as he gives me a soothing squeeze and I smile. But it’s not a happy smile. It’s one full of sadness and I am petrified that I will never get my smile back.

Titus pulls down a narrow side road before parking. Something feels off, and I don’t know why but there are certain things that don’t make sense. The Knights are a well-known name throughout London, yet I never have any protection other than Titus. Is this all a fabrication? Surely, I am a target to their enemies, but then again… does anyone know who I am?

“Ready?” Titus asks as he cuts the engine, his voice gravel like.

“Not really,” retorting, I open the car door before Titus has a chance to.

He leads me through another alleyway and that’s when I see the small, tucked away wedding boutique. I stall for a moment, just staring wide eyed at the sign.

Amora’s.

“Is this a joke?” I side eye Titus and he just shakes his head from side to side as if in disbelief.

I am so over this asshole. Storming forward, rage consumes me as I push through the door.

“Ah, Amora,” Wolfe is standing in the middle of the room, his eyes glistening when they land on me.

“What a pleasant surprise,” I roll my eyes and stand close to Titus. “Love the name, very original.”

I watch as he licks his top lip slowly. “I thought it was a kind gift, didn’t you Arabella?” and my blood runs cold when I see my best friend being dragged from behind a curtain by one of his henchmen.

“Oh my god,” I whisper as Wolfe grabs the top of her arm and pulls her close to him.

“Tell your friend that you thought my gift was kind,” he tightens his grip on her arm.

“It was a nice gift.”

I nod, “I agree, I’m sorry,” I am a mumbling, hot mess and my mind is working overtime and making me overthink everything. I will do whatever I need to make sure she is safe and doesn’t get hurt.

Wolfe shoves her forward and Titus steps in front of me so he can grab her and stop her falling.

“Are you okay?” I pull her from Titus and into an embrace, hot tears rolling down my cheeks.

She nods into the crook of my neck as we stay hugging.

“And let’s not forget mummy dearest now…” I hear his vicious tone, my head lifting when I see my mother being walked in. Her eyes find mine straight away, and I see the relief swarm her. God, I have missed her.

“Of course, we had to bring your mum along for the big day, every little girl needs their mother on their wedding dress day.”

“Mum,” I sob and she gives me a gentle nod. He lets her walk over to me, her arms cocoon me, and I never want her to let go.

“I’ve missed you so much my love,” she whispers, pulling away and cupping my face in her hands. “You look lovely,” she sniffs before kissing me on the forehead.

“I’ve missed you more,” I choke and let her wrap me in her embrace once more.

“Are you okay?” she asks me, us finally breaking apart and I see the worry in her eyes. I have no idea whether my father has told her about my pregnancy or whether he is keeping it under wraps for now. I don’t want to upset her or bring her any unnecessary stress.

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