Page 57 of Calculated Chaos

AXEL

After just a couple of days of waking up next to Holl, I’ve already become addicted to it. He smells good in the morning—soft, and exactly how I would describe cozy if it had a scent. His body is warm and he snuggles against mine with his face smashed under my armpit. Guess I don’t smell so bad either.

I have to piss, but there’s no way I’m disturbing him. Instead, I distract my bladder by imagining what we might do next. Definitely gonna buy some sex toys. Maybe we can convert one of our bedrooms since there’s no fucking way I’m not sleeping in the same bed anymore.

My mind wanders to what our friends and family might say, and if I even care. The only person whose opinion of my life has mattered for a long time is the guy lying next to me right now. I’m not sure anything matters besides the two of us and this new life we’re embracing.

The doubt that’s been plaguing me since it all started is fading, but not gone. At any moment now, Hollister could freak out and pull the reins. Hell, I could panic. I’m not exactly known for my relationship prowess.

I just have to hold on to hope that we’ll figure it out if anything goes sideways. Like the time we actually got in a fight over Cara Miles back in our senior year. To be fair, Cara was using our closeness to stroke her ego, but we fell for it. It was the first time we’d both liked the same girl, and one night at a party she’d invited us both to, it blew up, thanks to too much alcohol on my part and Hollister’s insecurity. It was the first time since we became friends that we didn’t talk to each other for a full twenty-four hours.

But Hollister’s maturity won out. He came over and told me that he’d rather admit defeat and let me have the girl if it meant keeping me as his best friend. At that moment, I realized no one was more important than Holl. We both told Cara to get fucked.

“Morning,” he whispers, kissing my side. “What time is it?”

“No clue.” I kiss the top of his head. “I have to pee. Be right back.”

“Mm hmm.”

I slide out of bed and head to the bathroom. Once I’m done, I hurry to the kitchen to start the coffee pot, then return to the bedroom. Hollister is sitting up, his hair standing on end as he frowns at his phone.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. It’s eleven. I don’t remember the last time I slept like that on a Sunday.”

“Feels good though.”

“Amazing, actually.” He sets his phone down. “I’d also like to point out that I have not looked at my email all weekend.”

Grinning, I crawl back into bed, slinking towards him. “Good boy.”

Hollister’s eyes heat as he gazes at me. “I love it when you say that.”

“I know.” Leaning in, I press a quick kiss to his lips. “You look delicious in the morning.”

“Delicious, huh? Whatcha wanna eat?”

“Mm, so many things. I want to tie you up and bend you over to gorge myself on your ass.”

He whimpers, rubbing his growing erection under the blanket. “Ax.”

“And then flip you over and suck your dick until you beg me to stop.”

“And then?”

“Fuck you, deep and long, drawing every sexy moan from that pretty mouth of yours.”

“You, sir, have dirty talk down.”

“I’m inspired.” I climb on top of him, pressing him into the mattress and rubbing against him. “I can’t get enough of you. There are so many things I want to do with you. To you. Let you do to me.”

“We have time. The rest of our lives.”

My chest flutters. “The rest of our lives. I can see it. Can you?”

“It’s already what we are. What we have been for most of our lives. I don’t see it ending unless one of us really starts craving a woman.”

“If that happens, we’ll talk, right?”

---