Page 11 of Calculated Chaos

“Relax, Hollister. I meant anal virgin.”

“Oh. Yes.” I know my cheeks are red since they feel like they’ve been set on fire.

“You’re missing out. Gonna flip you around now.”

I nod, exhaling slowly as Blaze removes my restraints. As he flips me around and I meet Axel’s eyes, my breath catches at his expression. He looks… turned on. I’ve seen that expression only a few times in his life and usually in the middle of some inappropriate activity he dragged me into. Like the time he took me to see a movie that was all about sex in public. That wasn’t uncomfortable getting a boner in the movie theater. Or the time he invited his girlfriend over and she brought a friend, and then several bottles of wine later, the two women proceeded to put on a show for us on the living room floor. I was both appalled and enthralled by their sexual freedom.

Not for the first time, a flicker of envy seizes my chest. I’ve always admired how Axel just does what he wants and isn’t afraid to experience something foreign or push himself out of his comfort zone. He doesn’t give a fuck about what other people think of him. He lives for himself.

And then there’s me. I sigh as Blaze works on my ankle restraints. I don’t even like to try new food, much less engage in anything unusual physically. Maybe that’s the part of me that made me stay for this demonstration. The part trying to get to the surface that I keep pushing down. What would happen if I let it all the way out?

Blaze is talking about floggers and crops again, but I’m distant now, lost in my thoughts about it all. That is until Blaze’s mouth moves over my growing bulge, his breath hot through the material of my jeans.

I gasp, looking down at him. He smiles up at me with a shit-eating grin. “Obviously, you can see what the front facing position is good for.”

“Yeah.”

“Also used for edging and CBT.”

“What’s CBT?” Axel asks.

“Cock and ball torture,” Blaze answers. “A little advanced for you two.”

“Why would someone want that?” I ask.

“To feel something,” Blaze says, his voice softening. “We all want to feel alive. Sometimes the world can beat us down, make us numb. BDSM is a way to push the numbness away and remember who you are beyond what the world told you to be.” He cups my chin while pressing against me. I can feel the bulge of his cock pushing into mine, and a shiver runs down my back. “And sometimes, we discover parts of ourselves that we didn’t know existed.”

I nod, swallowing hard. Blaze releases my chin, stepping off the cross and undoing my restraints.

He turns to Axel. “Want to give it a try?”

“Hell yeah,” Axel says, not hesitating to get to his feet at all.

I step down with shaky legs and an ocean of feelings about what I just experienced.

“Can I try that?” Axel asks, pointing to something that looks kind of like one of those barrel things gymnasts use.

Blaze chuckles. “You sure can, my friend.”

I settle into a chair, shifting around to avoid attention on the semi-hard erection in my too tight jeans. What’s got me aroused? A new experience? The restraint? Blaze? I shake my head, rubbing my wrist where the slight indentation from the cuff still lingers.

I don’t know the answer, but I do know I want to find out.

Chapter Six

AXEL

Not gonna lie, watching my very uptight best friend get his ass smacked by a dude that looks like he can bench press cars has me keyed up. I almost couldn’t stand waiting for it to be my turn, and part of me wishes I could just go all in. Take off my clothes and let Blaze show me the way. What the fuck?

“Straddle the bench, my friend,” Blaze says, gesturing to the large black apparatus.

I climb on it, getting situated, but knowing right away what some of the appeal is as my growing erection smashes into the hard leather.

Blaze does his speech again, talking about different toys and uses for the bench, but I realize something right away as the crop smacks across my clothed ass again. It makes my skin crawl with a desperate need to take control of the situation. I don’t want to receive the smack. I want to deliver it. Well, fuck.

“Uh, Blaze?”

“Yes?”

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