Page 36 of Calculated Chaos

“Is this okay, Holl?”

“Yes,” he moans. “I want you to do it.”

His cock hardens against my thigh and my head spins with need. I lift the paddle, stopping just before I swat him. “Safeword?”

“Broccoli,” he whispers.

I bring the paddle down, and I’d swear every ounce of stress leaves my body instantly. Hollister squirms on my lap, and in that moment, I know in the deepest part of me that this is something we both need.

What happens next is anyone’s guess.

Chapter Sixteen

HOLLISTER

Out of all the things I imagined I might do in my life, lying over my best friend’s lap in a room full of people getting spanked definitely wasn’t one of them. But when Jace offered his hand and gently led me to the front, never even asking the question, I knew without a doubt that I wanted to do it.

This might be embarrassing, but it’s gotta be better than watching Axel with someone else, the jealousy twisting my stomach into knots, the desire to run up there and shove the man off his lap fierce.

Now I’m here. It’s my body pressed against his thighs, my ass he’s rubbing with his large hand. My cock is painfully hard already and I’ve only been spanked once. I couldn’t find a coherent reason for my reaction if I tried, so I don’t bother. I just twist the material of his jeans between my fingers and brace for it.

“How many do you want?” Axel asks, his voice deep and raspy.

“Whatever you think I deserve.”

“Fuck, Holl,” Ax whispers. “You want this, right?”

Squeezing my eyes closed, I blow out a breath. “Yes. Please. I want it to be you, Ax.” His leg bounces beneath me, his tell when he’s nervous. “Do you want to?”

“Fuck yes. I’m just, um… centering myself.”

“Okay. I’m ready when you are.”

Seconds later, the leather paddle smacks against my clothed ass, and although it doesn’t sting the way I want it to, it’s still just fucking good. “More,” I whimper.

“Jesus, Holl.”

He brings the paddle down, a little harder this time, and I squirm, aware of his erection pressed into my lower belly. I’m sure he can feel mine pushing against his thigh. I have no idea why I’m not embarrassed.

Axel spanks me again, and I shiver as a stream of precum drips from my cock, leaving my briefs sticky. Without pause, Axel brings the paddle down on my ass several times, a whispered tumble of swear words spilling from his lips.

“I bet your ass looks so sweet right now,” Axel whispers, and a needy moan leaves my lips. “Such a good boy, Holl. You’re so good for me.”

I slump against his legs, my body boneless while the room spins around me.

“Ax…” No more words come as I fight back the overwhelming urge to dissolve into tears.

Then Rick is in front of me, his hands carding through my hair. “This is a sub drop you’re experiencing.”

My mind vaguely remembers the discussion about it. The feeling of euphoria and release that happens after an intense scene, the raw emotions and far away sensations.

“Breathe through it,” he tells me. “Axel, make sure he knows you’re here. In a private setting, this is the time for aftercare. Rub balm on his tender spots, wash him, feed him, and give him water. Whatever he needs to know he’s safe and taken care of.”

Axel’s hand slides under my shirt, rubbing my back. “I got you, Holl. I’ve always got you.”

I blow out a breath as the world stops spinning and I slowly slide off his lap onto my knees. Axel is gazing at me like I’m some kind of miracle, but all I can see is the man I rely on for everything. Even this.

I’m handed a glass of water and helped to my feet as the crowd erupts into applause for us. Damon smiles. “Thank you for the brave demonstration of safe and consensual play, guys.”

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