Page 29 of Silver Fox's Secret Baby

"How would you like to read about children who can fly and fight pirates?"

His head bobbed up and down. I led him over to the couch. I sat down, patting the cushion next to me. He climbed up and scooted in close.

I opened the book.

"Are there pictures?"

"A few, but the best pictures are the ones that you think up in your mind using your imagination."

He shrugged but sat quietly as I began to read. I had only gotten a few pages in when the door burst open and Samantha came rushing in. Her eyes scanned the room, settling on me and then Pax.

"Pax. What are you doing?" She turned her attention to me. "I'm sorry, Henry. He was supposed to be playing quietly in the playroom."

"It's not a problem, Samantha. Pax and I were doing a little exploring, weren't we?"

"We got to see a secret room."

"That's supposed to be a secret."

Both of Pax’s hands covered his mouth, and I laughed. "It's all right, Pax.”

"Pax, come on. It's time to get ready for bed." Samantha looked harried.

"But he’s reading to me."

I closed the book, keeping my finger at the spot we’d reached in the story. "I’ll save our place. We can read again tomorrow."

Samantha's face tensed, and I wondered if she didn't want me reading to Pax. More likely, she worried that he was getting in my way. The truth was, I enjoyed spending time with him.

Pax scooted off the couch and trotted over toward Samantha, who took his hand.

"Again, I'm sorry, Henry."

I rose from the couch, waving her apology away. "It was my pleasure."

Once she and Pax left, I took the book and placed it on the side table and returned to my desk.

When I learned that Victoria's mother was pregnant, I was terrified until the moment I held Victoria. At twenty-two years of age, I probably wasn't ready to be a father. I certainly wasn't smart enough to recognize what an awesome responsibility parenthood was. But I had taken to fatherhood, loving every moment of it. There was a time when I thought I might find a woman, get married, and have more children, but that never came to pass. The only woman who ever came close to making me think of forever after had been Samantha. For a moment, I let my mind imagine what our life would have been like had I been brave enough to love her. Surely, we would have had children.

I quickly shook the image from my head. Dwelling on the past never did any good. I was too old and too set in my ways now.

Sighing, I turned back to my work. This was my life now. It was a good life. At least that was what I would keep telling myself.

11

Samantha

Ichastised Pax all the way up the two flights of stairs as I took him to his room.

"He didn't mind, Mommy. He was nice."

"That's not the point, Pax. The point is that you snuck away and nobody knew where you were. That made me worried. Secondly, Henry is nice, but he's a busy man. He's being nice enough to let us stay here, but we have to stay out of his way." As I said those last words, guilt roiled in my gut. While it was true that I didn't want Pax to bother Henry, deep down, my motivation was selfish and cruel. I didn't want Henry spending time with Pax out of fear that he could realize who Pax really was. I'd always thought I was a good and decent person, but clearly, I wasn't. But I'd made my decision about Pax five years ago, and I needed to stick to it.

I got Pax into bed, tucking him in and making him promise not to wander off anymore. Of course, I knew that at four years old, Pax would likely forget his promise. At his age, there was very little impulse control.

Once he was in bed, I completed my nightly routine of preparing for the next day. When I finished, I decided I wanted a glass of wine and to read a little bit before I went to bed. Quietly, I made my way downstairs into the kitchen. It was dark, telling me that Knightly, Mrs. Tillis, and Caroline were done for the evening. I found the wine cooler, taking out a bottle of white and pulling a glass out from the cabinet.

"That's a good bottle of wine. Maybe you could pour me a glass too."

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