Page 112 of Imperfect Player

The bottle wins. The bottle always wins.

Incessant knocking on my door startles me awake. Baker is at my side, nudging my hand. My shouted demands to go away go unanswered, the pounding continuing. Louder. Harder.

“What?” I shout as I pull open the door.

Everly’s face stares back at me.

Scrubbing my hand over my face, I try to wipe away the sleep—and the drunkenness-before she can see it.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, trying to not sound pissed even though I am.

The last thing I want, or need, is for her to see me like this.

I’ve fucked up. I’ve been drunk. But this? I don’t think I’ve ever been this low. This bad. I have to admit, it even scares me.

“You invited me,” she says, holding up her phone and showing me the text I sent.

A text that was sent before I knew I wasn’t a match. The text I sent when I thought that I was doing the right thing and saving an innocent kid’s life. Instead, I just gave him his death sentence.

“Now’s not a good time.”

“Why’s that? Because you’ve been drinking? I know, remember?”

“I just don’t want you here,” I lie.

She doesn’t believe me, doesn’t buy it.

“What is it? What happened this time?”

This time. Another reminder that this isn’t the first time I’ve fucked up. Been nothing more than a loser, a drunk, a worthless piece of shit.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“It might help.”

I run my hand through my hair. “Nothing can help.”

“That’s not true. I can help. We can do it together.”

“No. We can’t. Christ, Everly, why are you even here? You shouldn’t be.”

Yet, she is. She stands here, strong and determined, eyes filled with love.

“I’m here because I want to be. Because I care about you. Because despite what your parents did to you, that’s not how love and relationships work. It’s not how I work.”

“I’m sorry, sunshine. I don’t want to hurt you.”

Her hands frame my face. “The only thing that hurts me is seeing you in so much pain.”

Where everyone else left, Everly stays. Where most people would give up, she fights harder.

The problem is, I don’t know if I’m worth the fight. My parents sure as shit didn’t think so. Why would Everly? When is enough going to be enough for her? When will she finally see the truth that’s staring her right in the face?

My parents saw it before it was even true. They knew. One day, Everly will too.

“It’s better for both of us if you just walk away.”

“That’s not going to happen. I’m not walking away. I love you, Ethan.”

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