Page 111 of Blood

He scoffs again. “That’s a goddamn lie, and we both know it.”

I pause and then quickly amend myself. “I only wanted you to die a few times.”

“Better.” He offers me a shaky smile that only serves to make my tears fall faster. “Violet?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m scared.” The fear in his eyes is like a blazing beacon that calls to the broken part of my own soul. “What’s going to happen to me?”

“You’re going to go to paradise or wherever it is that Fomorians go,” I tell him, more tears cascading down my cheeks.

“There’s no paradise for us,” Balor whispers tightly, but his eyes... They glimmer with hope, as if my words can somehow become reality just by me speaking them.

“Of course, there is.” I continue to stroke his matted hair as I struggle to speak through the pain compressing my chest. “And you’ll go there and annoy the shit out of all the other Fomorians. And, maybe in the future, you’ll find a way to visit me and the others. To, you know, annoy the shit out of me.” I laugh through my tears as Balor offers me a tumultuous smile.

“Do you really think so?”

“I know so,” I say quickly.

For a few moments, we sit in silence. I don’t even hear Cal and Athena, though I know they’re nearby.

Then Balor speaks. “Are Hux and Jack coming?” Vulnerability peeks through his normally apathetic eyes. “I need to talk to them.”

“They’re on their way,” I promise. “They’re coming.”

“I really did love them like brothers.” Balor’s eyes begin to water. “Do you think they’ll ever forgive me?”

“They already do, Balor,” I promise, needing to assuage the guilt I can see written across his face. My tears land on his cheeks, merging with his own. “I know they already do.”

“Can you tell them I’m sorry?” he whispers hoarsely. “Tell them...” He swallows heavily. “Tell them I’m sorry.”

“They’ll be here soon, Balor.” I stroke his hair even faster as sobs rack my body. “Just hang in there, okay?”

“And I’m sorry to you, too, Violet,” Balor continues. “I shouldn’t have...” His chest gives a rattling heave, rising and falling.

“You shouldn’t have what? Balor? Balor?” I give his shoulders a shake as my tears fall faster, each one burning my skin where it touches.

Balor’s features have slackened, and without that combative, almost ornery glint in his eyes, he looks like a completely different person. I can see the man he would’ve been if his entire family hadn’t been ripped away from him, if he hadn’t been forced to travel from host to host, if he hadn’t been fueled by his anger and rage.

“Balor?” I whisper, reaching for him.

But I’m thrown back when a ball of light bursts from his chest, racing through the air and then disappearing from view.

I try to shut down, try to retreat to a place where grief and guilt can’t reach me, but both gnaw at me, tightening my muscles, feeding the tension in my shoulders, refusing to be shut out.

And then I place my head against Balor’s still chest, and I cry.

Wherever you go next, whatever you find in the afterlife...I just hope it’s good to you.

I hope you find the peace you’ve been missing.

CHAPTER 38

MASON

There’s nothing more final or damning than the sharp scrape of reality, splicing at the skin of your knee and reminding you that every time you fall, you may not always get back up.

I’ve never felt as helpless as I did watching the battle waged in the land of the living while I was stuck on the other side of the veil, this floating, disembodied entity.

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