Page 13 of Bad Moon Rising

I touch my finger to the witch-mark around my wrist. It’s never failed to make me feel better whenever I missed him. How could that be the same guy who gave me this bracelet, who said that he wanted to protect me even when he wasn’t here?

“Lily-bean, are you okay?” My mom has noticed my face.

I plaster on a smile, even though my insides have turned into shriveled prunes. “I’m fine, Mom.”

Her lips thin into a perfectly straight line, and the fingers of her right hand drum against the inside of her left wrist. It’s her tell—one that hints at her irritation percolating just beneath the surface. “Was Brooks bothering you? I must say, I’m surprised it’s taken him this long to come home. After the way he stepped up when his parents died, and looked after the twins alone for all those years, I never thought he’d walk out on them. But I guess it shows that you can’t really trust anyone at that age.”

I want to argue with her, but if I talk about Brooks for a moment longer, I’m going to burst into tears, so I say instead,“It’s fine. I’m just tired. All the end-of-school stuff, you know? There’s so much to do. You had some brochures to show me?” Talking about colleges and my future never fails to divert my mom’s attention.

“I do!” Her whole face perks up. She grabs my hand and drags me into the living room.

Dad’s wheelchair is parked in front of the TV. He’s glued to a David Attenborough documentary, loudly correcting the famous British biologist about the latest research on howler monkeys as if Sir David’s ghost can hear him.

At the sight of Dad, My insides turn even more prune-y. I hardly remember Dad watching TV before the accident, but nowadays, he’s glued to it whenever he’s not at work.

My parents were driving up to New England last year for a lecture series at Harvard when a car ran them off the road. Dad’s side of the car collided with a tree, and he’s never been able to walk properly since. The police never caught the person who did it. It’s the reason I put off applying for college until now – I couldn’t think about applications while Dad was in and out of hospital.

Dad’s not able to work in the lab anymore—the university told him that he’s a “health and safety risk.” Mom wanted to fight them on it, but he wouldn’t let her. He’s an administrator now, and he always jokes that the science doesn’t happen if the purchase orders aren’t filed, but there’s no laughter in his eyes.

He still goes on the speaking tours with Mom, but he sits in the front row and lets her do all the talking now. We both think he’s depressed, and who can blame him? But have you ever tried to convince a fifty-three-year-old man to see a therapist? You’d have more luck getting David Attenborough’s ghost to learn how to twerk.

Mom’s eyes flick to the TV, and I see the pain arc across her features. This hasn’t been easy for her—she’s had to adjust to Dad’s new mobility needs, and her international career has taken a hit while she helped Dad through rehabilitation so he could get some movement back in his legs.

Part of the reason I don’t want to go off to a fancy university is that I want to be close in case Dad…in case he needs me. And yeah, the biggest part is that I’ve never been away from the Bellua brothers for more than a week on family vacation, and I can’t bear the idea of us being on other sides of the country. But I hate seeing Dad so sad.

I know that my college prospects are keeping my parents going right now, and I feel doubly guilty for everything I said to Orion on the way home. But they’re my best friends. You’re lucky if you get one special friend who lasts your entire life, and Jackson and Orion are it for me.

I thought I had Brooks, too, but I guess not…

“Look at these, Lily-Bean,” Mom smiles as she spreads out the brochures on the table. I peer down at the colorful college crests and smiling students with perfect teeth sitting under trees and walking through picturesque courtyards. I plaster a smile on my face.

“They’re great, Mom.” Names jump out at me—names of prestigious schools in states far, far away from here. Some of these schools aren’t even in the US. What?

“I thought we could go through them together, pick out the best biology programs. I know we’re pushing for Harvard, but it pays to be thorough, doesn’t it? That’s what we always say in the lab.” She laughs, and her laughter catches Dad’s attention.

Dad wheels his chair over. “Are those Lily’s college applications?”

“No, that’s all done online now.” Mom’s voice turns wistful. “It’s not like it was in our day. Do you remember those big paper forms we had to fill in?”

“I had to write my essay on a typewriter.” Dad grins up at her as he picks up a brochure for a university in Amsterdam. “I had to type that damn thing out twenty-three times because I kept misspelling Oligosaccharide.”

“Oggy-woggy-what-now?” I ask, but neither of them are paying attention to me. They’re smiling goofily at each other. My heart skips a beat. They’ve been through a lot with Dad’s accident, but they love each other so much. I want to have love like that one day.

Is it bad that as I think that, an image of the Bellua brothers flickers in my mind?

Yeah, it’s probably bad.

You’re just friends. They’ve all made that clear. Especially Brooks.

Just friends.

Just—

“You’re going to have the most amazing time at college, Lily.” Dad looks at me with such an expression of pride and wonder on his face, I can’t bear to go over the same old argument about college in Sardinia again. “The things you’ll learn, the people you’ll meet. I know you had your heart set on Sardinia but you deserve so much more than community college. You can aim higher.”

“Yeah, Dad,” I say. My voice catches a little on the words.

“How’s your essay coming along?” Mom squeezes his hand before flicking her gaze to me. “We should get it to your advisor next week so she has time to give you two rounds of feedback before the deadline.”

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