Page 94 of A Vicious Rumor

"They can be frustrating. What's going on?"

I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing the words out of my mouth. Talking about my feelings was not something that came easy to me. "I messed up this summer. Hurt her feelings really bad. Tried to push her away. Took me some time to realize some stuff, but I really want her back now, and I don't know what to do."

"Let me guess, she won't talk to you, huh?" my father asked lightheartedly.

"Yeah," I lamented.

"Well, unfortunately there's really only two options in these sorts of situations," he said. "You either decide to let her go, or you plan something so big and grand to get her attention that she can't help but talk to you."

"What did you do?" I asked, finally turning to look at him. "For Mom?"

He sighed, knowing I didn't mean my biological mother, but the woman that had left us both when it hurt me the most. "I knew it was useless to try the second option," he said. "You see, she left us emotionally before she left us physically. I know that's hard to understand from your perspective, even harder as a kid, but it was the situation."

"I hated you for what happened. I blamed you for her leaving." I don't know why I said that. I'd never admitted those words out loud, even to myself.

"I know you did," my father responded. "And in many ways you were right to do so. Love is hard. So is being an adult."

I nodded. I understood the first part, at least. Maybe I'd been too hard on my father for all of these years. Maybe he was just struggling as much as I was struggling with Lily.

"I'm sad she left us," I finally said.

My father nodded. "Me too. But we did okay, didn't we?"

I gave him a weird look. "Not really. We're mostly fucked up."

My father let out a loud laugh. "Yeah, you're probably right."

I couldn't help but laugh along with him. "Letting her go isn't an option for me, though," I said, when the moment passed. "It's just not."

"Then go for a big move," my father said. "Something that would mean a lot to her."

"I wouldn't know where to start. She's not that sort of girl. She doesn't really care about material things."

"Well, does she have a really good friend? Someone you trust to keep a secret? Someone who might be able to help you brainstorm?"

I looked at my father and nodded slowly. "Yeah, I think I know just the person." I just knew visiting him was gonna suck.

"Well, well, well," Ronny said as I sat down across from him at his favorite table. "They told me I had a visitor. Never thought it would be you!"

I cleared my throat and tried to remind myself that I was here because of Lily. "I need your help," I admitted.

"Well, it doesn't come free," he said, a twinkle of mischief in his eye.

I groaned. "Name your price."

"A game of 'Go Fish.'"

I looked at him, stunned. "Okay," I said, and he pulled out a pack of cards and began to shuffle. As he dealt the cards, I continued.

"I messed up pretty bad."

He snorted in laughter. "I'll say. Good that you realize it though. Most boys your age are dumber than a box of rocks and don't know their knee from their elbow."

I grabbed the cards he'd dealt, picking them up and fanning them out. It'd been ages since I played this game. "Yeah, well," I said, "I was forced to grow up fast."

"Sorry to hear that, sonny," he said, "but, do you have any ones?"

I threw him one of my cards. "Do you think you can help me?"

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