Page 16 of In Bed with the Enemy

"Not unless he has a pill that can cure feeling guilty," Ethan replied.

I let his words hang in the air between us, before finally speaking. "What do you mean, Ethan?"

"I mean," he said, propping himself up clumsily against the pillows so he could look at me, "that I feel like shit."

"Well, you have clearly been drinking a lot," I replied.

"Don't be coy, Amy," he said. "You know why I feel like shit."

"Maybe, you should say why," I bit back, not knowing why I was even entertaining this conversation.

This time, he let my own words hang in the air between us.

"You don't know what it's like, do you, Amy?"

"That's why you feel shitty?" I scoffed, not letting him pin the blame on me.

He ran his fingers through his hair and let out a dramatic sigh. "No, that's not what I'm saying. I fucked up, big time. I didn't mean for any of this to happen. I feel bad about it."

I waited.

Waited for him to apologize.

Needed him to apologize.

And, just as I thought I'd have to open my mouth and point out what was missing, he said it.

"I am sorry, Amy. Sorry for all of it."

"Me too," I whispered back, thinking about my behavior this afternoon. Even if Ethan had done me dirty at my presentation, I shouldn't have tried to retaliate. That's what ultimately lost me my investor, tonight. I could have dealt with the little bid of bad press. What I'd done was on me.

"I hate apologies," Ethan said.

"How interesting," I replied, honestly.

Ethan closed his eyes and started to talk, shaking his head a bit from side to side. "My dad, you see. When me and Harry were just kids. Company first. Always the company first. Before family, even. The company was the family. Let the company die, let the family die. Can't have that." He held a hand up to his cheek, rubbing it slowly, before dropping it. "Nope, can't have that."

He was quiet for another minute and I thought he might have fallen asleep, but he started up again. "I think your invention's amazing, Amy. You should have worked for us. We could have had it used much faster. You didn't. You didn't accept my offer."

"It wasn't really your offer," I replied.

"It was, though," Ethan said, opening his eyes up to look at me briefly before letting his head drop back down again. "I did it as soon as dad died. Started hiring people who wanted to make a difference. Hiring people who might care about the sea birds," he said and I furrowed my brow. I knew it likely made sense to him, whatever he was saying.

"I knew you were one of those people. And I was right."

"Yeah, well it's all over now," I replied.

"Why? Why's it gotta be over?"

"Our biggest investor pulled out after today," I admitted, not sure why I was sharing this information with him.

"Fuck," Ethan said.

"Yeah."

"I'm sorry, Amy. This is all my fault. It's all because Standard is behind. So behind on all this renewable stuff. I thought I had to do what I did. You scare me."

"I scare you?" I asked, shocked at his words.

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