Page 21 of Untamed

“I don’t know how to be friends with you!” She sounds frustrated, like she’s two seconds away from crying. “I don’t know what friendship looks like for us anymore. A lot has happened. A lot of things were said. I don’t know how to be Hayes and River again.”

Her blue eyes are wild with emotion, and in the setting sun, her freckles come out to play on her olive skin. She’s fucking beautiful. I don’t know how to tell her that I want whatever she’ll give me. Whether it’s casual conversation or late nights watching stupid movies. Whether it’s just friendship or something more. I want anything and everything.

“You just be yourself, River,” I tell her, taking a step closer. “Stop runnin’. Stop hiding from me. Talk to me.”

“I can’t talk to you!” She gives me a little shove. Cute. I don’t even move. “I don’t know how to talk to you. You said some really hurtful shit, Hayes.”

“And you told me we couldn’t talk about it. Do you know how badly I’ve wanted to apologize? To tell you that I’ve thought about that day every single moment since you walked out of my life? That I’ve not had a single good night’s sleep since you left town?”

“Don’t be dramatic.”

She wipes a tear from her cheek and refuses to look at me. So I grab her jaw and force her to. Her eyes bounce back and forth between mine while both of her hands grab hold of my wrist.

“Knock it off, Hayes,” she growls out.

“You’re being stubborn. It’s annoying. So I’m going to make you look at me and hear me. I missed you. I missed us. I am sorry for everything I said, River. I never should’ve called you all those ugly things.”

She sniffles, and the tears overflow. Shit, I didn’t mean to make her cry.

“Don’t cry, darlin’. It kills me to know I treated my best friend so badly. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, River. Please, forgive me. Let me make it up to you.”

“You were so mean,” she whispers. “You broke my heart.”

I don’t know if me yellin’ at her broke her heart or if how I reacted when she told me she loved me did. I’m sure both. But I can’t take it back. No matter how badly I want to go back in time and shut my motherfucking mouth, I can’t.

I was scared. She told me she loved me, and all I could see was me holding her back, being too attached to this ranch. Not being good enough for her. I was eighteen and fucking stupid.

“I know, River. I know.” I tug her into my body, holding her tightly against me. She cries into my shoulder, her breaths hot on my chest as she lets out all that hurt. “Let me keep apologizing until you don’t hurt anymore. But don’t run from me, River. Be my friend. Let me prove to you that I can be a good friend to you again.”

We stand in silence for a minute, and I let her completely soak my shirt through. It’s a small price to pay to feel River wrap her arms around me again. I didn’t realize how I took all of her touches for granted back then. But now? I savor every little thing.

She takes a deep breath.

“I want to strangle you.”

I laugh and run my hands through her soft hair. She smells like the ranch — honeysuckle and hay. I’ve missed the way she fits in my arms, and I don’t want to let her go.

“Kinky.”

“Hayes!” She groans and tries to pull away.

“I’m sorry,” I say, trying not to laugh anymore. “Here.”

I sit down on the grass and tug her down with me, making her straddle my lap.

“What in the world are you doing?”

Placing her hands over my throat, I lie back flat and put my arms out to the sides. I close my eyes.

“Strangle me. You have more leverage if I’m lying down and you can use your body weight against me.”

“Are you out of your goddamn mind?”

I peek up at her, and she’s looking at me like I’m crazy, but she isn’t crying anymore, and there’s a hint of a smile on those pretty lips.

“Probably. But if this is what it takes for you to forgive me, it’s a damn good way to go out.” I clear my throat and adjust under her. “Just don’t judge me if I get a little hard.”

“Hayes!” she squeals.

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