Page 93 of A Kiss at Midnight

“It doesn’t matter, does it, Blake? Because youalwayshad control. You always had what you wanted, even if you wanted me for all of the wrong reasons.”

How can I have broken this woman so thoroughly? I really have been a monster. I don’t want to let her go. But I know I have to in order for her to know she has a choice. Before I can change my mind, before I can haul her into my arms and lose all focus of what I’m doing, I pull out the documents from my attorney. She doesn’t take them from me; she looks at me with a trembling lip and glassy eyes.

“I’m handing over any and all legal rights to Justin,” I tell her, holding the file in front of her. “With my influence, no judge will deny you. I’ll make sure of it.”

She looks from the document to me and then back at the documents again. In her confusion, the tears stop, but the despair on her face doesn’t in any way disappear.

“I... I don’t understand,” she finally whispers.

“Jewel, I love you. Yes, I used to want to possess you. I used to want to own you, and I wasn’t above using blackmail to do it. But that changed when I fell in love with you. I didn’t know how to say the words. I thought I was telling you by showing you what I felt, and that’s been my downfall. You mesmerized me from the first moment our eyes met, and then something changed within me, something happened I never thought possible. The walls I’d built around my heart when I was a child suddenly began to crack, and one day I realized they were no longer there. You’re the reason I wake up in the morning, the reason I can’t wait to come home each evening. You’ve given me every ounce of happiness I have. I love you, Jewel. I love you so much that I can’t imagine living one more moment without you.” I want desperately to take her in my arms, but I need to hold back, to let her come to me.

“But... but our marriage isn’t real. It’s a business deal... and for Justin,” she says, looking confused.

“The business deal doesn’t matter, Jewel. We both know I’m not good at expressing my feelings. I wanted to marry you before I understood that it had nothing to do with my company. Maybe at first it was because I wanted you to be mine, because I couldn’t let you get away, but I quickly realized it wasn’t about possession. It was because my heart belongs to you. You’re my everything. I apologize for the string of clichés, but you make me feel them. You make me a better man, and I need you to continue to have faith in me so we can be a family — I mean you, me,andJustin. I’ll do anything to prove this to you.”

When she pauses for another long moment, doubt begins to creep in. What if she’s had too much? What if my confession is too little, too late? I can lose both her and Justin; I can’t imagine how I’ll survive it.

But if she needs me to walk away, I will. For her. All for her. I’ll do anything for her.

To my surprise, her lips turn up a little, and I see hope return to her eyes. And she takes one tentative step toward me, and then another, and then she’s wrapping her arms around me. And I realize we’re going to be okay. I don’t have the foggiest idea how long the two of us stand together, but when she finally pulls back, the love shining from her sparkling eyes is unmistakable.

“You hurt me so badly,” she says.

“I know, Jewel. I also know I have a long way to go before I can redeem myself in your eyes, but I want you to give me the chance to do just that.”

“I don’t know how we can make this better,” she says.

“Come home with me. Let me prove to you that I love you — that you’re so much more than a possession.”

“But so much has happened...” She stops speaking as sobs wrack her fragile frame.

“Do you love me, Jewel?”

I wait for her answer. If I’m wrong, if she doesn’t love me, nothing else matters. She takes so long to answer, I almost give up.

“I love you so much,” she says, “that I’ve spent the last few days wondering how I’m going to survive losing you. I told myself my feelings aren’t real, but that isn’t the truth. To live without you would be leaving a piece of my soul behind. I love you, Blake Astor. It’s never been perfect, but you rescued me from a life of misery. And somehow in the middle of all of it, I fell for you, although I believe I was a fool to do so.”

“Yes, you were a fool to fall for me and for believing in me, but I’m damn grateful you did.” I’m lost in her arms for several moments before I draw back again and gaze at her reverently. “I can’t believe what an idiot I’ve been. Thank you for saving me, and for saving us.”

“We’ve both been foolish, Blake, but it doesn’t matter anymore. All that matters from this point forward is that we’re always honest, and we continue to love each other through the good and the bad.” She brushes a kiss across my jaw.

“I promise you, Jewel, I’ll do my damnedest from here on out to make you know you’re loved, worshipped, and appreciated. I want to make you the happiest woman alive.”

She sighs. “That’s a start.”

I lean down and kiss her as the clock strikes midnight. I’m never going to lose this woman again, never going to treat her with anything but the upmost respect. She’s a gift and I finally appreciate what I’ve been given.

“Let’s go home,” I say to my wife. And that’s just what we do. Home, a concept that’s been foreign to me for most of my life, but now has meaning. We walk into our new lives arm in arm, ready for whatever the world might throw at us next.

Chapter Review

Epilogue

McKenzie

I flip my blankets offwith an angry shove, thrust my feet into my slippers, and blindly reach for my robe. Then I stomp through my house until I reach the front door. The loud pounding continues unabated. It’s what woke me, and put me in my rotten mood.

“Go away!” I shout through the door. I don’t give a damn who’s making the infernal noise. It’s two in the morning, and I’m not about to invite the ill-mannered person inside.

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