Page 71 of F*ck Steal Kill

When I stayed, it made his smirk grow wider. Or at least from what I could tell. His cheeks tilted up higher, and his eyes creased more. We were so close I couldn’t really see much else except him.

“You can push me away all you want, Holland, but I’m tired of running. Tired of playing games and denying myself for something I couldn’t control five years ago.”

Grady swallowed hard, real emotion entering his eyes and voice. His hand came up and cupped the side of my face, his thumb brushing a piece of hair behind my ear, and I melted.

I. Fucking. Melted.

No guy had ever done that before, and it seemed I was a goner for it.

“We’re so alike, you and I, but we could improve each other, too. We need to stop hiding behind the shields and armor and realize we’re still worthy of good things. Of this,” Grady whispered, sending my heart galloping.

I couldn’t deny my body’s response anymore or the fear that wanted to crawl up my throat. Hearing Grady, the man who’d been nothing but a thorn in my side since the second we’d locked eyes—showing a similar darkness within— that he felt something for me, I knew this moment had been inevitable. Even if I hadn’t realized it.

Closing my eyes, my body trembled as I physically felt myself drop the last of the walls that I’d been clinging to.

“Look at me, mi chispa.”

Taking in a shaky inhale, I opened my eyes and let him see me. All of me.

The parts I’d hidden.

The pieces I was scared of.

The things I felt shame for.

But also the love I had for my besties and the bond forming with his teammates.

“You’re so beautiful, Holland. Every single part of you.”

I didn’t think I was capable of it, but I felt myself swoon at those words. I guess my heart was a romance fanatic, after all. But I’d deny it if anyone said it.

“If you’re trying to get into my pants, you don’t have to try this hard,” I teased, though we both could hear how flat the words were. I swallowed when he didn’t immediately respond.

“I want that more than I thought possible, but I want it to be real. What I don’t want is this thin layer of mistrust still between us. I’m letting you in, Holland. Will you do the same?”

If there was ever a more loaded question, I hadn’t heard it before. Everything within my being wanted to run far away from this. I’d let my guard down. But for what? I didn’t do emotions. I didn’t do feelings.

But you have. With Joy. With Lacey. Even Quentin and Max. Why are you holding back from Grady?

I knew that answer even if I wasn’t willing to admit it—he had the most power to destroy me.

“Tell me about your fiancée,” I said, surprising us both. “I want to know what you were like before the Shadows.”

Grady nodded and released my cheek, moving back to his chair. I immediately hated the space but felt more myself at the same time, the surrounding air not feeling as suffocating.

“Camila was the best part of me. I was still my controlling self, but I definitely smiled more. When I found her…” Grady stopped, clearing his throat as emotion clogged it. “I never felt so angry and scared in my whole life. It felt like the sun was sucked out of the sky. Finding the men who did it was the only thing that got me up that first year. Max and Q became like brothers to me, and we all connected through our shared hatred of the Savages.”

“Do you ever fear that you’ll wake up one day and that burning rage won’t be there anymore?” I whispered, apparently shocking him, his brows raising.

“Every damn day. If I’m honest, it’s what scared me about you at first. When our eyes connected in the elevator, for once, I wasn’t focused on revenge, and that terrified me. It’s hard to remember who I was without this unquenchable need to make the men who took her from me pay.”

Feeling on equal ground once again, I slid off the desk and dragged my hands over his thighs as I lowered myself. He didn’t stop me as I unzipped his pants, his eyes searing into mine just like they’d done that first day.

“I can’t replace your fiancée.”

“I don’t want you to,” he answered quickly, shaking his head simultaneously.

I nodded, swallowing down my emotion as I cupped his dick through his boxers. Grady groaned, his head falling back for a second before he jerked it back to stare, wanting to see what I would do.

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