Page 50 of F*ck Steal Kill

“Hmm, that’s interesting. You guys never fight. Which means it must be about a girl.”

There she went again with that emotional intelligence, picking up on things I hadn’t directly said. Trying to hide secrets had always been a nightmare growing up, but I thought I’d improved as an adult. Now I wondered if she’d been letting me believe that, waiting for the right moment to remind me I wasn’t as clever as I thought.

“I’m not sure who’s worse, you or Q,” I grumbled, kicking a can further down the alley.

“Oh, definitely me. Quentin’s nicer and doesn’t call you out on shit as much.”

I clicked my teeth, knowing she was right. “I might’ve said something to a girl they like.”

“They? Did Max and Q finally admit their feelings?” she asked, surprising the shit out of me.

“What?” I spluttered again, my head feeling dizzy. What else had I missed?

“I swear you act like you’re the boss and know everything about your team, but it doesn’t seem you’re as close as you believe. Those two have been dancing around each other for years, either too naive to understand their feelings or too afraid. Maybe a little of both. I wondered if it would take a woman they both liked to face it. So, are they going to be poly now? Or just a triad?”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” I hissed, not appreciating how much her words stung. Here lately, I wondered if I knew either of them. Perhaps I had been deluding myself. Putting up too many walls that even my team couldn’t climb.

“Get with the times, Grady. Love is love. Don’t be a square and stand in their way. If they’re happy, that’s all that matters. Who’s this woman? She must be pretty special to make them both lower their guard and let her in, and in the process, open the door for them to be vulnerable with each other. I’d say I was surprised you haven’t thrown your hat in the ring, but you’re so walled up, a naked woman could be standing in front of you, and you’d look past her, wondering why everyone was staring.”

My mind blanked as I let her words sink in. I wasn’t in the mood to look too closely on today of all days, but it was also a nice distraction from remembering the worst day of my life.

“You’re delusional. You need to see someone,” I muttered, changing the topic.

“It’s the 21st century, Grady. If you’re not in counseling, you’re the problem. Don’t diminish what I said by attacking my mental health because it hurt your feelings.”

Feeling properly reprimanded by my older sister, I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck. Shit. She was right. I was being an asshole.

“Fuck. Sorry. You’re just bringing up a lot of things I haven’t been ready to look at too closely. I hadn’t realized what today was until you said it, and then it made sense why I’ve been acting so moody.”

“Apology accepted, but I’m probably not the only one you need to make it to. And I’m sorry if I crossed a line. I want to see you happy, Grady. We miss you. Bella misses you. You’re loved beyond measure. Don’t forget that because it might feel a bit darker today.”

“Thanks, Sis. I needed to hear that.” I let out a shaky exhale.

“So, what’s her name? At least give me that! Help a sister out!”

Chuckling, I felt lighter despite the heaviness of our conversation. “Her name’s Holland. Quentin’s convinced she’s the one and wants to share her with Max. I’m unsure about the other things between them as they haven’t shared that with me.”

“Holland. She sounds badass. I approve. And you? Where do you stand with her? Would you be willing to be in that type of relationship?”

Where did I stand? That was a good fucking question and one I didn’t currently know the answer to.

“That’s more complicated. I might’ve crossed the line and said some things this morning.”

“I hope she gave it back just as good.”

“Aren’t you supposed to defend your baby brother?”

“Um, no. Not when he’s being a little shit,” she said, her smugness evident through the phone.

“She might’ve slapped me and told me never to talk to her that way again,” I mumbled.

“Excellent. I like her already. You need someone who will push against your barriers and not take orders from you. Promise me that you’ll look closer if you feel even a speck of something for her. You can’t keep yourself hidden from the world and expect to live it. I just want the best for you.”

I swallowed hard; her words were more than I deserved. Yet, the love and emotion behind them drew me in, making me want them to be true. To feel worthy of love again. To have a purpose outside of revenge.

Because, again, she was right.

Revenge could only take me so far before I had to face the fact that Camila was gone and never coming back, no matter how many bad people I killed or put away.

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